


New Horizons

by missthingsplace



Category: Torchwood
Genre: Angst, Comfort, Complete, Hurt, M/M, Mpreg, Rating: NC17, Series
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-02-12
Updated: 2014-02-12
Packaged: 2018-01-12 02:50:45
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 22
Words: 43,034
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1181035
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/missthingsplace/pseuds/missthingsplace
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After losing Ianto and Gwen in the same attack Jack accepts a request by the queen in Washington DC</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

 

**Title:**  New Horizons  
 **Author:** missthingsplace  
 **Parings/characters:** Jack (Jack/Ianto Rhys/Gwen)  
 **Disclaimer:** I don't own Torchwood or any of the characters ... unfortunately, just borrowing them for a while.  
 **Summary:** After losing Ianto and Gwen in the same attack Jack accepts a request by the queen in Washington DC  
 **Spoilers: None**  
 **Warnings:** Angst, slash ... the usual.  
 **Rating: NC17**

  
Jack lent back in his seat and sighed softly to himself, wondering not for the first time if he was doing the right thing. The first time he'd got the email from Queen Elizabeth herself he had refused, told her there was no way he could leave his team and Cardiff, that they needed him. And the second, but the third time she emailed him he made his decision instantly.

The third email arrived telling him that it wasn't a request anymore, that it was an order. Even though she was the only person he and indeed Torchwood was answerable to he would have still refused if it had arrived a week earlier, but he didn't let himself think about it. He replied simply with 'Just let me know when my flight leaves' and pressed send.

So here he was, just two days later sat in the first class cabin on a plane bound for Washington DC. Alone. And that was the part he was trying to forget, the fact that just nine days earlier he had lost both Ianto and Gwen to a gang of gun toting aliens that had fallen through the rift. None of them had been prepared for such a vicious species, they never stood a chance.

When Jack had gasped back to life the first thing he saw was Gwen's bullet riddled body, scanning the area he spotted Ianto's. Jack got to his feet ignoring the aftershock pains that were still spiking through he body and ran over to his lover, collapsing in a flood of tears beside him, cradling his broken body as he sobbed into his still chest.

“Are you okay Sir?” A voice asked, bringing his out of his thoughts.

Jack brushed the tear that was sliding down his cheek away before he answered. “I'm fine.”

“Can I get you anything Sir? I'm afraid I can't serve alcohol until we take off but maybe some juice?” The flight attended asked.

“Water, thank you.” Jack replied, forcing himself to straighten up in his seat.

“Of course Sir.” She replied before heading off to fill his request.

Jack watched her as she walked down the plane, under normal circumstances he would have flirted with her but that certainly didn't apply at the moment, in fact he wasn't sure if he would ever flirt with anyone ever again. He took his bottle of water with a 'thank you', unscrewed the cap and took a few deep gulps before recapping it and placing it on his small table.

Pulling out the printed copy of the emails Jack scanned them again, rereading the information it provided. Apparently the US had long know of a small rift running through Washington DC but had been denying it since forever, the FBI had tried to take control of it but their resources were limited and not helped by the fact that no one really believed in the existence of aliens due to even the slightest hint of them being covered up.

Eventually someone in the US government had mentioned he had heard of a organisation the UK called Torchwood who were there to deal with these problems, when asked why the President and the White House had never heard of them he had replied that they were a secret. He had been scoffed at and asked how he knew of them if they were a secret, to which he replied he had a cousin living in Cardiff where Torchwood was the worst kept secret ever.

Eventually the president contacted the UK government and they directed him to the queen, a little surprised when she had responded and confirmed the existence of Torchwood and after extensive talks agreed to set up what would be known as Torchwood Five in Washington DC. The president wasn't impressed when the queen told him that Torchwood answered to no one but her but in the end he conceded and agreed to the terms of the agreement.

Jack folded the sheets of paper and put them back in his pocket as the flight attendant arrived by his side again, placing a glass of champagne on his small table along with his meal. Jack pushed the chicken and veg about, barely touching it, his appetite had diminished since ... closing his eyes Jack let thoughts of three days beforehand flood into his brain.

He could so clearly remember his emotions as he stood at their gravesides, he and Rhys had decided that neither of them should be frozen in the depths of Torchwood and as their graves were side by side they had unique funeral, a joint funeral. At first the priest had objected but after long discussions and a generous contribution to the church he agreed to grant their wish.

Jack had been fine till they lowered the coffins into the ground, the image forcing the fact that he would never see Ianto again, never hold him in his arms again, never kiss him again, never feel the touch of his body overwhelming him as tears began to pour down his face. The hand that grasped his, knowing it was Rhys' without even looking as they both sobbed out their grief over their lost loved ones.

“Tea or coffee Sir?”

The words interrupted Jack from his thoughts again. “Tea, thank you.” Jack replied without looking up, not wanting her to see the sadness in his eyes, the tears pouring down his face, grateful that the first class cabin was barely occupied.

“Have you finished Sir?”

“Finished?”

“Your meal?”

“Yeah, not really hungry.” Jack replied, his voice hitching as he attempted to keep his emotions under control.

The flight attendant lifted the meal out of his way and left him alone again, wiping his eyes with the handkerchief, one of many he carried in his pockets. He never saw the flight attendant throw his meal away and move to one of her colleagues, never heard her express her concern for the handsome man who seemed very upset and lonely.

When she returned with his tea she couldn't help but notice his wallet on the table and the photo he held in his hand, a photo that showed two men, the one holding the picture and another, cute and younger looking incredibly happy and covered in confetti. Jack glanced up without thinking and she saw the sadness in his red rimmed eyes and her heart broke for him. Placing the tea on his small table she sat gingerly on the edge of the seat beside him, not sure what to say.

“He died.” Jack told her.

“I'm so sorry, your wedding day?” She asked, indicating the photo.

“Happiest day of my life.” Jack told her, a tiny smile playing on his lips.

“How long? How long were you married?”

“Would have been five years next month.”  Jack replied sadly.

“How long is it, I mean, when did he ...”

“Nine days ago, feels like nine years.” Jack whispered. “I feel like part of me is missing.”

“You're going home?”

“Home?”

“You're American?”

“Not exactly, no my home is in Cardiff, this is just a business trip.”

“So soon, are they so uncaring they send you away on business barely more than a week after you lose your partner?” She asked.

“I chose to go, thought it might help.” Jack shrugged.

“He was gorgeous.”

“He was beautiful, wonderful, sexy and I loved him more than I ever thought possible.”

“It'll get easier.”

“So they say.” Jack replied sadly.

“I have to get back to work, can I get you anything else?”

“No, I think I'm going to close my eyes and try to get some sleep.”

“Okay Sir, I'll leave you to your thoughts, just call if you need me.”

“The names Jack, and thank you.” Jack told her as she got up from the seat and walked away.

Putting his hand into his pocket he pulled out the small packet of sleeping pills, popped one into his mouth and covered himself with the provided blanket before placing the small pillow under his head. He had been told by his medic they were quick acting, they weren't kidding he thought as he closed his eyes some ten minutes later as he felt himself falling into sleep.

_Jack could feel Ianto's breath on his neck as his placed small butterfly cases to the base of it, a tingling sensation flowing through his body as the kisses trailed slowly down his spine, Ianto pausing now and then to nip, suck or lick an area that took his fancy before continuing his journey down his lovers back until he reached the cleft of Jack buttocks._

_Moaning softly as Ianto's tongue retraced his journey back up his spine and gasping as Ianto's teeth grazed the skin of his neck before he sucked it hard into his mouth. Jack twisted his head round as Ianto's mouth left his neck, capturing it in a passionate kiss as he felt Ianto's fingers teasing the cleft of his arse before dipping between it's cheeks._

_As he felt a lubed finger tease his hole his hips canted upwards in anticipation of what was to come, letting out a low moan of pleasure as the finger slid easily inside him. Jack slowly thrust his hips, pushing back on Ianto's finger as it fucked him before pressing his aching cock into the bed below desperate for some friction as Ianto held his hands above his head with his own free hand._

_“Please Ianto.” Jack gasped._

_“Please what?” Ianto teased, adding a second finger._

_“Just fuck me.” Jack begged._

_“Like this?” Ianto asked, fucking him faster with his fingers._

_“Ianto!” Jack growled._

_Ianto let out a small chuckled as he fingers slid from Jack's body, encouraging him onto his knees he slid between his legs and aligned his cock with Jack's hole._

_“This what you want?” Ianto asked as he slid his full length in slowly until he was fully seated, Jack's arse tight around his cock._

_“You're a tease Ianto Jones, you know that?” Jack groaned._

_“And you just love it.” Ianto replied, thrusting slowly and deeply._

_“Touch me.” Jack murmured through his shallow pants._

_Ianto placed one hand firmly on Jack's hip as the other wrapped around his body, his hand grasping Jack's cock firmly and pumping it in time with his thrusts._

_“Faster, need to come.” Jack told him, thrusting his hips back and forth faster as he tried to speed up Ianto's own movements._

_“All in good time.” Ianto told him, bending down and kissing his way up Jack's spine again as his increased the speed of his thrusts slightly._

_“You're going to pay for this later.” Jack moaned, feeling himself teetering at the edge of orgasm and desperate to fall over it._

_“Oh I'm looking forward to it.” Ianto replied, his thrusts speeding up at last as they panted and moaned their way to towards orgasm._

“Sir, sir, wake up, sir, are you okay?”

Jack jerked out of sleep, looking bleary eyed at the flight attendant who had a worried look in her eyes.

“What?” Jack asked, his tone a mixture of annoyance and confusion.

“You sounded like you were having a bad dream, one of the passengers was worried about you.”

“No, no, I'm fine.” Jack told her, becoming more awake. “Please apologise to them for me.”

“No need to apologise sir.” She told him.

“At least let me buy them a drink.” Jack insisted.

She was about to reply that the drinks were complimentary but stopped herself. “Of course Sir.”

“Less of the Sir, I told you, it's Jack.”

“Okay, Jack.” She told him before moving to ask the concerned gentleman what he wanted to drink.

Jack lifted the blanket and sighed with relief at his deflating erection and grateful he had covered himself with the blanket before sleeping. Lifting the blanket off he got up and headed for the toilets, relieving himself before splashing his face with water in an attempt to freshen up a little. He remembered the dream as if it was real, now he was awake it just reminded him of what he had lost.

Making his way back to his seat he glanced at his watch, with barely half an hour until they were due to land the sun was appearing on the horizon. Jack sat watching out the window as Washington came into view in the bright sunlight of the early morning, this is it he told himself, a new horizon that signalled the start of a new beginning as the announcement to fasten their seatbelts came over the tannoy. 

tbc


	2. Chapter 2

Jack spotted the FBI agent that was assigned to meet him the moment he walked through to arrivals, he grinned to himself at the thought that the man looked exactly like every stereotypical idea that an FBI agent should look like and almost chuckled loudly but managed to stop himself and gain his composure as he approached the man.

“Mr. Smith I assume?” Jack asked, reaching out to shake his hand. “Pleasure to meet you.”

As he said the like he could see Ianto in his mind rolling his eyes and giving him that look he always gave him when he managed to flirt by just saying hello and immediately felt guilty.

“Captain Harkness, welcome to America.” The man replied, totally oblivious to Jack's flirty hello. “I'm here to take you to your destination, follow me.”

Jack followed Mr Smith across the terminal, as soon as they exited into the bright light of the early morning the heat hit him. Pulling his greatcoat off Jack draped it over his arm and continued following the man towards the black unmarked limousine that waited by the kerb in the no parking zone.

“After you Captain.” Mr Smith said as he opened the door of the car. 

Jack slid gratefully into the air conditioned interior and sank into the cool leather seat as the other man climbed in and sat beside him, as soon as he closed the door the car began to move smoothly away from the airport.

“So what exactly my destination Mr Smith?” Jack enquired.

“They never told you?” Mr Smith asked.

“Well, they never told me where I would be based, no.”

“Then Captain Harkness I think you will be impressed.”

“How about we drop the 'Mr' and 'Captain'?” Jack asked. “The names Jack, and you are?”

“I'm not sure that's very professional Sir.”

“Never, ever call me Sir.” Jack replied abruptly.

“I'm sorry Sir, I mean Cap ... Jack.” The man gulped. “The names Charles, well Charlie.”

“Well Charlie, lets hope I am impressed or I will be straight back on a plane to Cardiff.”

“How long have you lived in Cardiff? That's an American accent.”

“It's not, not really.” Jack replied. “And as for Cardiff a very long time and I'm still not exactly sure I should have left.”

“Left someone behind?”

“He died.” Jack replied bluntly. “It's not something I wish to discuss.”

“I see ...”

“No, you don't ... you really don't.” Jack replied, turning away and staring out the window at the passing scenery, signalling the conversation was over.

Jack glimpsed the White House as they sped past it wondering where the hell they were going, but actually relieved that it wasn't his destination. He had been a little worried they were going to stick him in some room in it so they could watch his every move.

His other worry was they were going to do the same thing in the FBI building, he hoped that would be proved wrong too as they came to a stop near the Abraham Lincoln Reflecting Pool.

The heat hit them again as they exited the car, Jack pulled his coat out with him and found his sunglasses in the pocket and donned them against the glare of the bright sunlight as they walked along the bottom of the Reflecting Pool and around the side of the Abraham Lincoln Monument.

As they reached a spot about half way along the side Charlie came to a stop, stepped up to the wall and vanished. Once Jack had had a moment to realise what he was seeing he stepped forward and joined Charlie in the cover of the perception filter.

“You don't seem surprised?” Charlie said as he drew what looked like a small remote control from his jacket and pressed a button.

“We have one, a perception filter that is, in Cardiff.” Jack replied as a hidden door slid aside. “Ours is much cooler though.” Jack added as they began to descend the spiral steps inside.

“In what way?”

“We have a lift.”

“Well, hopefully what you find at the bottom will impress you more.”

“I hope so.” Jack muttered under his breath.

“Sorry, did you say something?”

“No, doesn't matter.” Jack replied as they neared the bottom of the steps.

“Welcome to Torchwood Five.” Charlie announced, pressing his palm to a electronic pad and opening another door.

Jack stepped though into the bright artificial light and looked around, apart from being underground it didn't resemble the hub in any way at all. The place was clinical looking, the walls were covered in plain white tiles and the floor was plain concrete.

Everything in the place appeared to me made of glass and chrome, it couldn't have been more impersonal if it tried. Charlie led him through the place pointing out the state of the art computers and medical bay before taking him into what appeared to be the conference room with it's huge glass and chrome table.

Stepping into the room Jack glanced around at the three other people there, giving them a look that said he wasn't expecting them as they all smiled widely at him. Barely registering that there was one woman and two men Jack turned to Charlie for an explanation.

“Meet your team.” Charlie told him. “Miss Angela Stanley, computer genius, Mr Christopher King, research is his ability and Dr Dafydd Jones.”

“All FBI I assume?”

“Some of our finest.” Charlie replied proudly.

“Well, I don't want to seem unappreciative but I hand pick my team members and I'm not comfortable with having FBI agents in my ... here.” 

“We're only trying to help.” Charlie replied, trying not to sound a little offended.

“No offence meant, I just pick the people I know will be best suited for the job.” Jack explained. “And I won't be taking this position if it involves the FBI in any way, I, we, Torchwood don't answer to anyone but the current queen.”

“Her majesty made that perfectly clear, but you must understand we have rules here just like in the UK.”

“Then you need to read what she told you a little more closely, Torchwood are above the law.”

“But ...”

“No buts, we do what we have to do and no one gets in our way.” Jack knew he was being arrogant but he need this man to know exactly what was going to happen.

“Well, we'll see Sir.”

“Drop the sir before I drop you.” Jack almost growled, making the other man almost shudder at his tone.

“Jack, sorry.”

“Now, lets get these people out of here and I can start finding my own team.” Jack instructed.

“Look, how about a compromise?” Charlie asked.

“In what way?”

“You keep them on a trial basis, if they prove their worth they sever all ties with the FBI and work for you alone. If not, you replace them with whoever you choose.”

Jack thought about it for a minute before coming to a decision. “Okay, but I was access to their complete files, I need to know everything about the people that work for me.”

“They will be accessible on your computer by the end of today.”

“Okay.” Jack said turning to face the other people in the room properly for the first time. “Does anyone know how to make a decent cup of tea?”

“Tea?”

“Yeah, I gave up drinking coffee a little over a week ago.”

“Why would you do that?” Angela asked.

“None of your business.” Jack replied, a hint of sadness in his voice trying to betray him.

“My aunt sends me proper tea over once a month, along with other things I miss.” Dafydd told him.

“Then I think I love your aunt.” Jack replied, looking at the young man properly for the first time. “Dafydd Jones wasn't it?”

“Yep.”

Jack gulped, finding himself looking into the man's eyes and seeing something he knew should be impossible.

“Not very American, that name.”

“Nope, I'm Welsh but my parents emigrated here when I was eight, I kinda adopted the accent.” He replied, switching his accent to Welsh as he got to the end of the sentence.

“I used to know a Jones.” Jack told him, seeing Ianto clear as day in his mind.

“Very common name in Wales.” Dafydd replied. “I'm actually a little responsible for you being here.”

“How come?” Jack asked, getting more curious my the minute and unable to take his eyes off Dafydd's.

“I was the only person in the FBI to have heard of Torchwood.” He explained.

“And how exactly did you know about Torchwood?”

“My cousin, he's older than me but we kept in touch, well we did.”

“How did he know?”

“The worst kept secret in Cardiff he called Torchwood, it's strange but about six or seven years ago he just seemed to stop writing, well emailing and I discovered just over a week ago he died.”

“He died?” Jack mind was racing, it was impossible, wasn't it, that Ianto was related to Dafydd?

“Some kind of accident, no one seems to know the details. Guess I'll never hear from him again now.”

“What ... what was his name?” Jack asked.

“Ianto, Ianto Jones.” Dafydd replied, seeing a cloud cross Jack's face. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah, fine.” Jack replied, regaining his composure. “He had family?”

“Just his mam and his sister, Rhiannon.”

Jack sat down on one of the seats around the table and picked up one of the glasses of water that was placed on it and downed the contents in a couple of gulps.

“Can I get you something, are you feeling ill?” Charlie asked him as the others looked on confused.

“No, I just need to be left alone for a bit.”

“If you're sure?” Charlie asked. “I need to take you to see your apartment.”

“Come back in a couple of hours please, the rest of you, I'll see you bright and early tomorrow morning.”

All four of them left, agreeing with his comment as Jack finally let a tear fall down his face. He made no attempt to wipe it away as it dripped onto the glass table, followed closely by a second.

“No point brooding.” Jack murmured to himself as he got to his feet and began to explore the base properly.

The medical bay looked like it was fully equipped and beyond, the computers really did look like they were the state of the art as Charlie had described them. He found a very modern bathroom with a couple of shower cubicles and brand new lockers, they had none of the appeal of the old Victorian bathroom of the hub back in Cardiff but he imagined they were more efficient.

As Jack stared at the showers images of being in the shower with Ianto crept into his mind, he let them linger for a few minutes before his emotions threatened to overwhelm him and forced himself to leave the bathroom.

Then he happened upon the small kitchen area, his eyes sweeping around it taking in the small fridge and microwave before settling on a coffee machine that looked so high tech he wouldn't even know where to begin with it if he was still drinking coffee.

Jack picked up the box of tea bags and read the label to himself. “English Breakfast Tea.” Better than nothing he thought as he placed one in a mug and flipped the kettle on.

Leaning against the wall opposite as he waited for the kettle to boil he found his eyes drawn to the coffee machine, this time it was just images of Ianto serving his coffee, his fingers lingering on his own as he handed it over that filled his mind.

And this time he didn't even try to shake them off, sliding down to wall and crumpling in a heap on the floor Jack let the tears flow as he sobbed into his arms, knowing that coming to DC wasn't going to help him get over his loss any faster.

He was still there when Charlie returned to get him an hour later.

TBC


	3. Chapter 3

“Jack, are you okay?” Charlie asked, rushing over to his side thinking that maybe he was hurt.

Jack didn't move, he was just staring into space, he wasn't crying but Charlie could see the dried tear tracks on his face.

“Come on Jack, lets get out of here.” Charlie said, putting a hand on Jack's shoulder and shaking him slightly.

“Charlie?”

“Yeah, I think I should take you to your apartment.” He held out his hand to Jack, Jack grasped it and let him help him get up from the floor.

“This isn't going to work Charlie, I think I should just go back to Cardiff.” Jack told him as they walked across the base towards the stairs.

“Don't make any rash decisions, sleep on it at least.” Charlie told him. “You might feel differently tomorrow.”

“No, I shouldn't have come, it's not going to solve anything, I can't run away from my grief.”

Charlie opened the door that led them back out into the fresh air, Jack took a deep breath and walked with Charlie towards the limo. Neither of them spoke much on the short journey, Jack seemed lost in his thoughts so Charlie left him to them.

The limo stopped outside what appeared to be a very plush looking apartment building, once they were out the car Charlie got Jack's rather small looking suitcase from the boot and led the way into the building.

“I have the keys.” Charlie told him, leading him towards the lifts.

“Which floor?” Jack asked, his finger poised over the panel of numbers buttons.

“Right to the top, the penthouse.” Charlie grinned. “I hear you like heights.”

Jack nodded. “Yeah, not used to living in somewhere high thought.” Jack replied as they exited the lift and walked the few feet to the door of the apartment.

“There you go.” Charlie said, handing Jack the keys.

Jack put the key in the lock and turned, pushing the door open slowly. Upon seeing the interior Jack let out a low whistle.

“Now that's what I call an apartment!” Jack exclaimed.

“Just wait till you see the rest, we were told it had to be the best for you.”

“God bless her majesty.” Jack chuckled softly. “Believe me, compared to some places I've slept this is heaven.”

“Okay, as you can see this is the main living area.” Charlie said as he placed the suitcase inside the room and closed the door behind them.

The room seemed huge, it was decorated in white and various shades of blue which seemed to suit the room perfectly. The floor was solid wood as was all the furniture, the room was sparsely furnished but not so little that it looked clinical.

There were two enormous dark blue leather sofa either side of the coffee table and a huge plasma screen TV hanging on one of the walls. At the far end of the room in front of the huge picture window there was a dining area with a table a chairs and what appeared to be a drinks cabinet.

“Let me show you the rest.” Charlie told him, leading him to one of the doors leading off the room. “This is the bedroom.”

There was a king size bed dominating the room, a bedside table each side of it and a large wardrobe dominating the wall opposite the bed. The room was decorated in shades of grey and white and the bedding was black and very expensive looking.

“Seems such a waste of a big bed.” Jack muttered.

“Whys that?”

“I don't sleep much, haven't done for a long time and well, there's no one to share it with.”

Charlie noticed the clouded look come over Jack's face. “Come on, more to see.” He told him, ushering him from the room.

Next was the bathroom, it was fully tiled in white and black, the bath was huge and sunken and the taps and other fixtures and fittings were chrome, the room sparkled.

“I'm more of a shower man.” Jack told him, noting the shower over the bath.

“Maybe you should become a bath man, might help you relax.” Charlie said as he herded him to the final room.

“The kitchen.” Charlie told him with somewhat of a flourish. “Everything you could ever want.”

“I don't cook really.” Jack shrugged. “Are there any good takeaways around here?”

“I'll arrange for some menu's to be delivered to you.” Charlie told him. “We could get you a full time house keeper? There's someone who'll come once a week to clean but if you want someone who'll cook as well it can be arranged.”

“I'll manage.”

“If you change your mind, just let me know.”

“Thanks. Don't feel you have to baby sit me, I'll be okay.”

“I've not got anywhere to be, life with the FBI doesn't give me much free time to meet anyone.”

“Probably best, only leads to heartbreak.” Jack told him, sitting down heavily on one of the sofas.

“Want to tell me about it? Have you talked to anyone one?”

“No, Ianto's family kind of blame me I think, they barely spoke to me at the funeral. Rhys was too wrapped up in his own grief at losing Gwen and I don't have any family, not the usual sort anyway.”

“Not the usual sort?”

“Bit hard to explain.” Jack told him, not wishing to get into the whole Doctor thing.

“Tell me about Ianto.” Charlie told him, walking over to what was a drinks cabinet and pulling out a decanter of brandy.

Charlie poured two generous measures, carried the glasses and the decanter over to Jack. Placing the decanter on the coffee table he held out a glass to Jack.

“I don't really drink.” Jack told him, eyeing the glass up.

“You wouldn't want me drinking alone would you?”

“Well, okay, maybe one.” Jack replied, taking the offered glass.

Charlie sat down on the sofa opposite Jack. “So, you were telling me about Ianto.”

“I'm not sure I'm ready to do this.”

“Might help you decide what to do tomorrow, whether you leave or stay.”

“Jack sighed. “I wouldn't know where to start.”

“What was he like, you have a picture?”

Jack pulled out his wallet, pulled out the small photo of them both on their wedding day and handed it to him across the table.

“You were married to him? That's legal there then?”

“Civil partnership that called it, but to us, we were married.”

“How long?”

“Nearly five years.”

“Looks like a was a great guy.” Charlie told him, handing him the photo back.

“He was, you seem very accepting of the fact I was married to a man?”

“My cousin is gay, never bothered me.”

“I'm not gay.” Jack chuckled. “Or technically bi for that matter either, omisexual is the general term.”

“Omisexual?”

“General term meaning I like who I like.” Jack grinned, no way he was letting this man into his secrets.

“Sure.” Charlie replied, still none the wiser. “So, come on what was so special about this Ianto?”

“He was beautiful, sexy, snarky, funny, made the best coffee in the universe and was fantastic in bed.” Jack told him, a wistful look in his eye as a tear rolled down his face, he brushed it away and took a long sip of his drink.

“Sounds like quite a guy.”

“He was, he was all mine and I loved him more that I could have ever imagined.”

“How did he die?” Charlie asked. “Sorry, you don't have to answer that.”

“We were attacked, this gang of aliens came through the rift. They were armed with machine gun and we weren't prepared, they were vicious, Ianto and Gwen were killed instantly. I'm not sure I can ever forgive myself for letting them die like that.”

“You can't blame yourself.”

“I was the boss, I should have been able to save them, or died with them.”

“What happened to the aliens?”

“They're dead.” Jack told him bluntly, taking another long sip of his brandy. “I hunted them down, caught them off guard and killed the lot of them.”

“I'd have done the same.”

“You sure about that?”

“Someone hurt my family I'd want revenge.”

“How long is it since he died?”

“Nine days.”

“Nine days? What the hell were you thinking, agreeing to coming here so soon?”

“Thought getting away from Cardiff would help, just hearing all those Welsh vows was killing me.”

“Welsh vowels?”

“Nothing sexier than a gorgeous Welshman talking.” Jack gave a small smile. “It's the way they pronounce ... everything.”

“I'll take your word for it.”

“I miss him so much everything around me seems to remind me of him, even just the bloody coffee machine.”

“So I can imagine, if he made the best coffee in the world.”

“Universe.” Jack corrected him sadly. “And I'm not sure I'll be able to work with Dafydd.”

“Because he's welsh?”

“No, because it seems he's Ianto's cousin.” Jack replied. “Everything fits, all the details he gave today and ... and there's his eyes.”

“His eyes?”

“He has Ianto's eyes, every other thing about his is different, his hair colour, skin tone ... but his eyes are exactly like Ianto's.”

“I can get him replaced, tomorrow if you want?”

“Then I'd feel bad, no, if I stay I'll just see what happens.”

“If you stay, so you might then?”

“Right now, I have no idea.” Jack sighed. “You're right, I should sleep on it.”

Jack drained the last of the contents of his glass and refilled it without even thinking about it as Charlie watched his closely, there was nothing but sadness the Jack's eyes and even he was beginning to think that Jack should just fly home in the morning and let his grief take it's natural path.

“Top up?” Jack asked, holding out the decanter to Charlie.

“Sure, why not.” Charlie held out his glass and let Jack pour another generous measure. “So, who's looking after Torchwood Cardiff?”

“UNIT, we never got round to replacing the other two team members when they were killed, wow, that's more than six years ago now. I hope they're treating Myfanwy properly, mind you, if they're not she's just try and eat them.”

“Dog?”

“Pterodactyl.”

“You have a dinosaur as a pet?”

“Came through the rift, played match maker for me and Ianto actually.”

“Bloody hell!” Charlie exclaimed.

“ I know, she'll be missing Ianto as much as me, I shouldn't have left her ....” Jack seemed to drift off into a world of his own for a moment. “I don't want to appear rude Charlie but I think I need to be on my own for a while.”

“You're right, it's getting late and you have an important decision to sleep on.” Charlie replied, draining his second drink and getting to his feet. “I'll be here at 9am sharp for your answer.”

“Thanks, for everything.” Jack told him, walking him to the door.

“It's my job.” Charlie replied.

“No, you went above and beyond that.”

“See you in the morning Jack.” Charlie told him, walking to the lift as Jack closed the door behind him.

Jack finished his drink and had a quick shower, the jet lag was catching up with his fast. Sliding into the bed naked and still a little damp Jack closed his eyes and prayed sleep would come swiftly, it did within minutes of his head hitting the pillow and drifted into another world where Ianto was still alive..

TBC


	4. Chapter 4

_Jack let out a soft sigh as he felt soft lips kiss the back of his neck, tilting his head to allow more access as the kisses trailed around his neck towards his collarbone and not stopping until they reached the sensitive juncture where his neck met his shoulder._

_His head tilted even more as he felt the sharp edge of Ianto's teeth graze his skin moments before his mouth latched on hard to his neck and the little spikes of pleasure that came with Ianto marking him began to shoot through his body._

_“I wish you could mark me forever.” Jack whispered dreamily as Ianto kissed the blossoming bruise._

_“No need, we both know that you're mine and I'm yours.” Ianto whispered back, moving so he could face Jack. “We don't have to announce it to the world.”_

_“But I want to, I want to announce the whole world from the rooftops that I love Ianto Jones.”_

_“You're daft, you know that, don't you?” Ianto smiled, pulling a piece of confetti from Jack's hair. “Anyway, we just did that.”_

_“In a way, I guess.” Jack agreed, lifting Ianto's hand and kissing the white gold band that adorned his ring finger._

_“That you're daft or about what we did.” Ianto chuckled softly._

_“You're a brat, my beautiful brat.” Jack told him, claiming his mouth with his own in a tender kiss._

_“Forever.” Ianto replied, returning the kiss._

_“Forever is a very long time.” Jack pondered thoughtfully. “I can live with that.”_

_“Good, because I'm not going anywhere.” Ianto grinned, wrapping an arm around Jack and pulling their bodies flush to each other._

_“You know, we really should have undressed before we got in this predicament.” Jack said thoughtfully, making love to one's husband is so much easier when your naked.”_

_“True, but apparently we couldn't wait to try out the bed.” Ianto replied. “And who said you were making love to me? I might want to make love to you.”_

_“We have all night, we can make love to each other and then just spend the rest of the time just fucking our brains out.”_

_“Always the romantic!”_

_“You call me soppy when I try and be romantic!” Jack pouted._

_“I don't call today soppy and it couldn't have been anymore romantic if you had tried.”_

_“Only the best for the man I love.”_

_“Even my mother was impressed, now that's an accomplishment to be proud of.” Ianto laughed softly._

_“She never thought I'd make an honest man of you, she actually told me to back off once.”_

_“She never?” Ianto asked a little shocked._

_“Yeah, first time I ever met her. She told me I was too old for you and I obviously wasn't good enough for you and that she had watched me flirt with everyone else in the room and that she's wasn't having it.” Jack chuckled._

_“You should have told me.” Ianto replied indignantly._

_“Didn't see the point, I'm a big boy, she didn't scare me.”_

_“Lesser men, or women for that matter would have run for the hills after that.”_

_“Good job I didn't take any notice then.” Jack replied before pecking Ianto on the lips. “Why are we talking about your mum on our wedding night?”_

_“No idea.”_

_“I can think of better things to be doing with our mouths than talking about anyone.” Jack murmured into Ianto's ear._

_“Didn't you know? Once you get married sex becomes a chore that you only do to have kids.” Ianto replied, his face completely serious._

_“You're kidding right? Please tell me you're kidding?”_

_“You should see your face, it's a picture.” Ianto told him, bursting out laughing._

_“Brat.”_

_“As if that would happen, with your looks and those bloody pheromones what chance to I stand of ever abstaining from sex?”_

_“None whatsoever!” Jack told him triumphantly._

_“Even when I'm old and grey we'll still be at it like rabbits.” Ianto grinned._

_“Yeah, even then.” Jack replied, kissing Ianto hard to expel the thoughts that were trying to invade his mind that he might not have him anywhere near that long._

_“I love you.” Ianto panted when the kiss finally broke._

_“What's not to love!” Jack joked before becoming more serious. “I'll love you for eternity.”_

_“That's a long long time Jack.”_

_“I know.”_

_This time when their lips met their hands fumbled with clothing, each others and their own and they became desperate for even closer contact. Buttons were popped open, belts unbuckled, ties untied and zips lowered in a hurry as they hurried to reach their goal of nakedness._

_“You really are beautiful.” Jack told Ianto as he lay naked on the bed, flat on his back, lips swollen and bruised from their kissing, Jack leaning over him from his position between his legs._

_“Tell me how I ended up with you? I still don't believe it sometimes. Maybe this is all a dream and I'm still trapped inside Canary Wharf with ...”_

_“Don't.” Jack bent down and kissed Ianto, stopping his words as he pressed his body to his lovers._

_Ianto's mouth opened easily beneath his, inviting his tongue inside and moaning softly as it tangled with his own. Wrapping his arms around Jack tight he could feel Jack's hardness pressed to his own, he didn't care who made love to who at this point, as it really didn't matter anymore._

_Jack heard Ianto give a small groan of disappointment as he broke away from the kiss, giving a small smile to himself when he kissed Ianto's neck and the groan became a moan of pleasure as he gave him a mark to match his own._

_“I'm going to make love to you all night.” Jack told him, his voice husky with love and lust._

_“I'll never want the night to end.” Ianto replied, his back arching off the back as Jack's mouth sought out a nipple and drew it between his lips._

_Jack grazed the nipple with his teeth extracting a low moan of pleasure from Ianto before biting down on it a little harder._

_“Damn!” Ianto muttered as the pleasure overtook the pain._

_Jack soothed the nipple with his tongue before kissing his way down Ianto's chest, the fingers of one hand tangling in the soft hairs of Ianto's chest as his mouth reach Ianto's hip._

_Ianto's hips raised off the bed as Jack left another mark, Ianto's thighs opening even wider as Jack knelt back on his heels and slid his hands up the inside of Ianto's thighs._

_Jack took a moment to drink in the sight before him, Ianto with his eyes tightly closed as he lay there wantonly, his straining cock standing to attention and the sight of his tight hole as he used his hands to spread the cheeks of Ianto's buttocks._

_“Jack?” Ianto whispered his name as he opened his eyes._

_“Still here.” Jack grinned, lowering his head and teasing the leaking tip of Ianto's cock with the point of his tongue, delving in deeper to taste his essence._

_“Don't. Tease.” Ianto panted, a hand pressed to Jack's head trying to get him to take his cock into his mouth._

_“Never!” Jack chuckled, his breath teasing the tip of Ianto's cock further before he dropped his head and deep throated him in one swift movement as Ianto let out a loud guh sound._

_Jack hollowed his cheeks as he began to suck with vigour, his head bobbing up and down fast as he gave head in a way only he could until he sensed Ianto was reaching his peak and then slowly released his cock from his mouth._

_“Need to come.” Ianto moaned. “Don't stop.”_

_“I know, but I want to feel you come as I thrust deep inside you.”_

_“Then get on with it.” Ianto grumbled impatiently._

_Jack chuckled as he reached for the lube. “Patience is a virtue you know.”_

_“Patience can fuck off, I think my cock might explode.” Ianto replied as he felt Jack's fingers slid inside him, preparing him. “Just get your gorgeous cock in my arse and fuck me.”_

_“If only people knew what a dirty mouth you have.” Jack replied as he withdrew his fingers and positioned his cock at Ianto's hole, pressing to it but not penetrating._

_Ianto canted his hips upwards. “Now!” He growled as Jack slowly slid inside him until he was ball deep._

_“So tight, so hot.” Jack told him as he began to thrust, deeply and slowly._

_“Faster.” Ianto begged as he reached down for his own cock as began to stroke it firmly._

_Jack reached for Ianto's ankles, lifting them up he raised them over his shoulders, placing his hands either side of Ianto's hips he began to thrust faster as faster._

_Ianto yelled Jack's name with a strangled cry as his come shot over his own fist and torso, stroking himself through his orgasm to prolong it for as long as possible as Jack slammed into his body._

_The contractions of Ianto's arse around his cock were sending Jack into heaven, he tried to hold back, wanting to savour the feeling off just being near the edge but as Ianto reached down and trailed a finger though his own come and offered it to Jack he submitted to his own orgasm._

_Jack's come shot deep inside his lover as he savoured the taste of Ianto's essence in his mouth, not stopping his thrusts until he knew he was completely spent._

_Ianto slid his ankles off Jack's shoulders and pulled him down, wrapping his arms around him tightly as he kissed him hard, tasting himself inside Jack's mouth._

_“We should rest and then you can kick off round two.” Jack told him, sliding his cock from Ianto's body and moving off his body and next to him on the bed._

_Ianto turned to face him. “I wish we could.”_

_“Why can't we? We have all night.”_

_“No, you're going to wake up soon.”_

_“I am awake, I don't understand what you mean?” Jack frowned._

_“This is a dream Jack, a wonderful rerun of our wedding night but a dream all the same.”_

_“It can't be, it seems to real.”_

_“And it was but now it's just a memory, a way for you to be close to me.”_

_“Then I refuse to wake up.”_

_“You remember?”_

_“You left me, you died.” Jack whispered, weeping openly into the soft hairs on Ianto's chest. “You said you'd stay with me forever.”_

_“I meant it, I didn't want to die Jack.”_

_“I feel so alone.”_

_“You'll meet someone else but until then you'll always have me, in your dreams.”_

_“It's not enough.”_

_“If I could still be with you Jack I would, you know that.”_

_“What's that noise?” Jack asked, trying to ignore it._

_“Your alarm clock, time to wake up Jack.”_

“No, I refuse.” Jack fumbled about with his eyes closed and hit the off button but by the time the noise stopped the dream and Ianto were gone.

Jack reached for the other pillow on the bed, feeling so lonely in it's huge expanse and held it close as he realised he had been crying real tears in his sleep.

“I miss you so much.” Jack said into the empty room as he wiped away his tears on the pillow.

Jack sat up suddenly and glanced around as he could have sworn he heard Ianto's voice reply. “I miss you too.”

Jack slid out of bed and headed for the bathroom, standing under the cascading water he wasn't at all surprised to see his cock flaccid between his legs. His libido seemed to have vanished completely since Ianto died, except in his dream.

Ianto was wrong he told himself as he got out the shower and wrapped a towel around himself, he would always have him in his dreams because there was no one good enough to replace him.

By the time Charlie knocked on his door he was fully dressed, he had foregone the usual t shirt under his shirt and the sleeves of the shirt were rolled up to his elbows but other than that he was dressed in his usual attire.

“You're staying?” Charlie asked when he opened the door to him.

“For now, going home won't solve anything.” He replied, feeling a touch of deja vu.

“If you're sure?”

“Yeah.” Jack told him, reaching for his coat and then dismissing it knowing it would be too hot with a frown on his face.

“Something wrong?”

“No, no, just realised I don't need a coat.” Jack told him as he followed him out the door, feeling strangely naked without it.

“You'll need it in winter.” Charlie shrugged as they made their way down to the car.

Jack nodded. “I guess I should get to know my new team.”

“It's a start.” Charlie replied, wondering what had happened to change Jack's mind as they got into the car and headed for the Torchwood Five base.

TBC


	5. Chapter 5

Jack sat in his new office and surveyed it's surroundings properly for the first time, the only way it resembled his old one at the hub was that it had glass walls.

His desk had a strong metal frame, top of it made of glass at least three inches thick. There was a metal filing cabinet and a small set of drawers made from the same metal against one wall and the black leather chair he was sat in.

It was all clean, clinical and functional and Jack didn't feel at all at home. He resolved that if he was staying he would have to add some personal touches, a photo or two and maybe a plant.

Like most of the base it was on the same level as everything else, the only place that went lower into the ground were the holding cells. He hadn't ventured down to them as they were as yet empty but they were as clinical as the rest of the place.

Jack had asked Charlie to ask the others to go into the conference room when they arrived and to tell them he would meet them there, all three of them had arrived within minutes of each other and he could see them waiting patiently around the table for him.

He looked again at the three files on his desk, each with the name of one of his new employees on the front in neat handwriting. He knew they had been placed there deliberately but he didn't want to learn about them from their FBI files, he needed to know the real people.

Making his decision Jack got to his feet, picked up the files and left his office. Striding purposely towards across the base and into the conference room, he dropped the files onto the table and sat down.

“Morning.” Jack said, giving them all a patented grin.

They all greeted him in their own way.

“Okay, see these.” Jack began. “These are your files from the FBI, given to me to inform me all about you. But as I stated before, I choose my own team.”

“So you're firing us?” Angela asked, sounding more than a little disappointed.

“No, you are all on a months trial. In that time I want to see how we all work together, if we can be a team.”

“And if we're not suited, then we go?” Dafydd asked.

Jack nodded. “Yes, but if you stay then you cut all connections with the FBI and become a Torchwood employee.”

“Sounds fair to me.” Christopher agreed.

“Everyone?” Jack asked, looking at Angela and Dafydd.

“Yep.” Dafydd responded, accompanied by vigorous head nodding my Angela.

“Brilliant!” Jack exclaimed. “So, to hell with the files, I want you to tell me about yourselves.”

“What do you want to know?” Angela asked.

“Anything and everything.” Jack told her enthusiastically.

“If we tell you about us, will you tell us about you?” Christopher asked.

“Depends on how interesting your stories are.” Jack grinned. “But I want the truth, no playing with it to make yourselves more exciting that you are.”

“So, who's going first?” Angela asked, looking at the others.

“Well, since you asked, might as well be you.” Jack told her.

“Tell me if I'm boring you.” She giggled nervously. “Right, I'm 27 years old, I'm DC born and bred. At a very early age my parents were told I had an IQ that was off the scale and at school it became apparent I had an aptitude for computers.”

“How long have you worked for the FBI?” Jack asked.

“Nearly four years.”

“And what made you want to work for Torchwood?”

“They offered it to me, I felt like I needed a new challenge and, well, it's aliens right?”

Jack grinned at her. “I get the feeling aliens are still treated like they don't exist here?”

“That's what I want to find out, I want to see, meet aliens for myself.” Angela replied excitedly.

“That's a good start, okay, tell me more about yourself, personal life?”

“I have a small but close circle of friends, some of which I met back in college. I don't have a partner at the moment, too much work and not enough play as they say.” Angela chuckled. “I love going to the movies and dining out, I can't cook except for heating up pizza, I love to read and I love music.”

“Any particular genre of music?”

“Most things, from maybe the 1940's onwards. The 40's and 50's are my favourite eras though.”

“I think you and I will get along just fine.” Jack chuckled.

“Really?”

“Well, I already approve of your musical tastes.”

Angela beamed with delight.

“Christopher, how about you?”

“I'm 32, born and raised in Virginia mostly but my parents moved here when was I was fifteen. My dad got a job with the FBI and I followed in his footsteps when I reached 22, so I've worked for them for the last ten years.” He replied.

“Why did you agree to work for Torchwood?”

“Same as Angela, I want to find out if the rumours about there being aliens were true.”

“They are, believe me.”

“Then I hope I get to keep the job.”

“Time will tell, now, tell me more about you.”

“I have a long term girlfriend, well, fiancée I should say as we got engaged just over a year ago. Both of us are career minded and have made the decision to not have children, we spend our spare time going hiking, camping, fishing. We're out door people.”

“Any date for the wedding?” Angela asked.

“No, we thought we'd save first, we don't want to get into debt over such a great occasion.”

“Always wise.” Jack told him.

“So my dad tells me.”

Jack gave a small chuckle. “So, Dafydd, your turn.”

“As I said, I'm from Wales. I grew up in a suburb of Newport and my parents emigrated here when I was a kid, my tad works for a large bank and they offered him the opportunity to work in their head office.”

“You said your cousin had told you of the rumours of Torchwood years ago, why did you lose touch?”

“He was ten years older than me, I guess he grew up and I was still just a kid to him and our emails trailed off.” Dafydd shrugged.

“How old are you?”

“23.”

Jack gulped, almost the same age as Ianto when he joined Torchwood Three. Trying desperately not to gaze into the eyes that reminded him of Ianto Jack asked him another question.

“So, I take it your aunt informed you all that Ianto had ... died?” Jack gulped again, this time to suppress the lump in his throat and to stop the tears welling in his eyes.

“Did she give you any other details, on what he did, where he worked, if he was single or married?”

“Why?” Dafydd asked, wondering why Jack would want personal details on a cousin he had never known.

“Just wondered, as you had lost touch?” Jack asked, trying to backtrack.

“Right, don't really know to tell the truth, I never asked my mam.”

“No problem.”

“So, more about yourself.” Jack asked, faking a grin.

“I'm single, I've had girlfriends but nothing serious yet. I still live with my parents but only because it's convenient and cheap, but I want to find my own place soon. I have lots of friends, both male and female that I spend my spare time with going to bars, clubbing and eating out.”

“I think we'll all get on just fine.” Jack told them. “But as I said before, time till tell.”

“Your turn now.” Angela told Jack, smiling sweetly at him.

Jack grinned widely. “I'm older than I look, much older. Despite my accent I'm not American, for the last, well, for too many years than I care to remember I have lived in Cardiff and have been the leader of Torchwood three for around seventeen years.

“Married, single, straight, gay?” Angela pushed.

Jack laughed at her forthrightness. “Widowed, as for my sexuality, I don't believe in labels.”

“How long?” Christopher asked. “Since you were widowed.”

“Ten days.” Jack voice was barely a whisper as he replied.

“Ten days!” Exclaimed Angela. “What the hell are you thinking? You should be home with your wives relatives grieving, not here.”

“Husband, and they blame me.”

“Why?” Dafydd asked.

“They blame me and Torchwood.”

“He worked with you?” Christopher asked.

“It's how we met, like we were meant to be.” Jack replied sadly.

“What was his name?” Angela asked gently.

“Ianto ... Ianto Jones.” Jack replied, avoiding Dafydd's eye.

Charlie who had been sitting quietly at the table throughout the whole meeting spoke for the first time as he spotted the signs that Jack was going to break down again.

“Time for a break I think, lets go and get some brunch.” He suggested, standing up.

“Sounds good to me, I'm starving.” Christopher agreed, following suit along with Angela.

“I just need to pop to the bathroom, I'll catch you up.” Dafydd told them as they left the room and headed in the other direction.

When he returned Jack was still in the conference room, his arms folded on the surface of the table and his head resting face down on top of them. He was about to leave when he heard Jack speak.

“Sit down Dafydd.” It was a request, not an order.

Dafydd sat opposite him and waited for him to speak again, although he knew what was coming. Jack raised his head, his eyes red rimmed as he looked at him.

“I think you've guessed already that my Ianto Jones was your cousin?” Jack asked him.

“The last I heard he was with a girl called Lisa, I never heard any rumours that he was gay.”

“Lisa died, he tried to save her but he couldn't. We actually have her to thank for bringing us together, in a rather odd way.”

“So Ianto was bi?”

“No, not really, he just ... fell for me.” A small sad smile crossed Jack's lips. “Who could blame him.”

“Do you have a picture?”

Jack took his wallet from his pocket and showed him the small picture from their wedding day, as soon as Dafydd saw it he knew it was his cousin, even though he hadn't seen him in years.

“It's true.” He said softly as he handed it back to Jack.

“We were attacked, he and Gwen, our team mate were killed outright, I couldn't save them.” Tears were pouring freely down Jack's face. “It would have been our fifth wedding anniversary next month.”

“I'm so sorry Jack, I can't imagine how hard it is to lose someone you love like that.”

“I'm still not convinced I should have agreed to this job but I had to get away from Cardiff, but even here there are so many things that remind me of him.”

“Grief is a hard thing to leave behind.” Dafydd told him, getting to his feet as Jack did.

Jack moved over to the glass wall of the room and stared out. “He made the best coffee in the universe, I can't even bring myself to drink a cup of it now.”

“Grieving is normal Jack, you have to let yourself or you'll go mad.” Dafydd said as he came to a stop at Jack's side.

“There's something else that's going to remind me of him more than anything else here and I'm not sure if I'm going to be able to handle seeing them every day.”

“Can I help, can I get rid of whatever they are?”

“No, not unless you're able to change your eyes.”

“My eyes?”

Jack reached up and stroked Dafydd's cheek. “The one family trait I can see in you is your eyes, they mirror Ianto's exactly.”

“I can leave, I don't want to but ...”

“No, as hard as it is to have you around I think now it would be too hard without you here.”

“I'm straight Jack ...”

Jack gave a sad chuckle. “Don't worry, I'm not going to try and get in your trousers, or anyone else's for some time.”

“I think Angela might have a crush on you.”

“Then I hope she gets over it quickly.” Jack replied. “You should go and catch up with the others, this conversation is between us, they don't need to know.”

“They won't hear any of it from me.” Dafydd reassured him. “Are you sure you want to be alone?”

“Positive.” Jack told him. “Go and have brunch.”

“I'll keep them away for a while.” Dafydd told him as he left the room.

“Thanks.”

Once Dafydd had gone Jack wandered through the base not sure where he was going and found his way down to the holding cells, as he stood opposite one of them he imagined he could see Janet in it and hear Myfanwy screeching above.

He was missing more than Ianto, but nothing else came close to how much he was missing his lover. Making his way back to the main floor of the base he headed for the bathroom, splashing water on his face he glanced in the mirror.

“You're a mess Jack Harkness.” He told his reflection then headed back to his office to try and regain his composure before the others returned.

Jack had only been sitting at his desk for a few minutes when the phone rang, someone had reported a man in a strange mask running around not far from the reflecting pool. The police had called the FBI and they in turn called Jack, he ran to the medical facility and was grateful to find it stocked with strong sedatives.

Hurriedly filling a syringe and grabbing a nearby plastic carrier bag he ran from the base to catch his first US Weevil.

TBC


	6. Chapter 6

The sun blinded Jack for a moment as he emerged from the perception filter, from the screaming he could hear the weevil had obviously moved closer to the reflecting pool.

Once he could see clearly again Jack could see it at the opposite end of the pool, it was on the floor struggling with something as the onlookers screamed in horror.

As Jack neared he could see it was human, a woman from what he could tell. Jack yelled at the crowd to get away to safety as he fired a warning shot into the air in the hope to distract the weevil.

It worked, the weevil released the body from the grip of both it's claws and teeth as it turned to face Jack, blood dripping from it's jaws as it let out a loud growl.

“Come on then.” Jack goaded it.

Snarling it lunged at Jack, at the last second he dodged expertly out of the way and it tumbled to the floor. Jack pounced, straddling it and pinning it to the ground, putting the bag over it's head and then he pulled the syringe from his pocket.

Jack injected the sedative into the weevils neck before it knew what was coming and quickly lapsed into unconsciousness.

Getting to his feet Jack became aware he was now surrounded by even more of a crowd, quite a few of local police officers that we pointing their weapons at him.

Now that was something that would never have happened in Cardiff he thought to himself as he grinned brightly at them.

“Afternoon gentlemen.”

“Drop your weapon Sir.”

Jack lowered it slowly to the ground. “Just reaching for ID.” He told them, sliding his hand into his trouser pocket and pulling out his wallet as the offer neared him cautiously.

“Captain Jack Harkness, Torchwood.” He told him, flashing his ID.

“Torchwood?” The officer questioned.

Jack sighed. “We're new around here, but you'll come to love us.”

“I'm going to have to take you in for questioning sir, on the matter of murder.”

Jack gave a low chuckle. “This is not dead, just sedated but if I don't get it secure soon it will kill more people.” Jack replied, gesturing towards the body the weevil had mauled.

“Jack, what's happening?”

Jack looked up to see his team approaching with curious looks on their faces.

“Just a little Torchwood business, so if two of you could grab that body and carry it back to the base I'll be right behind you.” Jack replied.

“But sir ...” The officer began again, not getting any further as Jack cut him off.

“This is over, we're in charge of this now.” Jack told him, picking up the weevil and hefting it over his shoulder.

Jack walked away from the scene, following Dafydd and Christopher who were carrying the body with Angela and Charlie a few steps in front of them.

Once inside the base they carried the body to the medical bay and Jack took the weevil to the holding cells, dumping it unceremoniously on the floor before looking the door.

“What is it?” Angela asked, startling Jack a little.

“Time to meet your first alien, we call it a weevil.”

“It came through our rift?”

“Yeah, they live in the sewers but every now and then one of them comes to the surface and attacks.”

“The sewers, yuck.”

“I'm sure I don't need to tell you what they feed on.” Jack grinned.

“Gross!”

Jack chuckled. “What shall we name it?”

“Name, you want to give that a name?”

“Sure, why now, we have to call it something.”

“Is it a boy or a girl?”

“No idea, but it doesn't really matter, it can't understand us and vice versa.”

Angela pondered for a few minutes as he stared at the thing in the cell. “Tim.”

“Tim is is!” Jack exclaimed. “It's going to be a little while before it wakes.”

“It killed that poor woman.”

“And we need to identify her and make her death look like an accident.” Jack told her, leading her from the cells.

“Surely her relatives and friends have the right to know how she really died?”

Jack shook his head. “No, the world isn't ready for all this yet.”

“But all those people out there, they saw what happened?”

“We'll let it slip to the press that it was a madman in a mask, they won't question it believe me.”

“But had claws and huge teeth.” Angela replied as they reached the main base and headed to the medical bay.

“Don't matter, just need to plant the idea in their head and they'll take it as red.”

“Jack, this woman is ripped to shreds.” Dafydd called to him as they entered the room. “What the hell was that thing?”

Jack spent the next ten minutes explaining to them what he had just told Angela and answering almost identical questions.

“And it's called Tim.” Jack finished.

“Tim?” Christopher enquired.

“I named it.” Angela told them proudly.

“So, we have to make this woman look like she died by some other means than being ripped to shreds by an alien?” Dafydd asked, brushing a hand through his hair in a way that made Jack gulp at a memory.

“Yeah, we also need to find out who she is, she should appear on a missing persons list in the next forty eight hours so we know who she is.”

“I'm sure I can do something.” Dafydd replied frowning, looking less sure than he sounded.

“Brilliant! Now, how about a cuppa tea?”

“Sure I can't persuade you to have coffee, that machine makes great coffee.” Christopher replied.

“No, teas fine.” Jack replied, heading off to his office.

“There's more to him that he's telling us.” Angela stated.

“And he'll tell us in his own good time, I'm sure.” Dafydd told her, looking at the corpse before him and wondering where to start.

“I guess I'm making the tea then?” Christopher asked.

“Well you were the one to suggest it.” Angela grinned.

Jack watched Christopher cross the hub towards the kitchen, it was nothing like the small kitchenette they had at the hub, there was even a couple of comfy chairs there like a staff room.

He was missing coffee almost as much as he was missing Ianto but he just couldn't bring himself to drink it, it somehow seemed like he would be betraying Ianto if he did.

Moving to the wall of his office Jack watched Dafydd moving around the medical bay, it wasn't just his eyes that reminded him of Ianto, there were little gestures too, like when he ran his hand through his hair.

And those he couldn't help but think about when Dafydd switched his accent from American to Welsh, it almost broke his heart again to hear the Welsh vowels he thought he had escaped.

Dafydd had made it perfectly clear that he was straight and not interested which comforted Jack a little, his pheromones would have no effect on the young man and so there would be no temptation on Jack's part.

Not that he intended to flirt with him, but if Dafydd had flirted with him he wasn't sure if he would be able to resist those eyes.

Jack glanced over at the light tap on his door.

“Tea?” Christopher asked, walking in and handing him a mug.

“Thank you.”

“You looked like you were somewhere else?”

“Maybe, just for a minute.” Jack replied, his smile not quite reaching his eyes.

“So, not all aliens are little grey men then?” Christopher asked, feeling the need to change the subject.

“Little grey men?”

“You must have heard of the x files?”

“No, what's that?” Jack asked curiously.

Christopher laughed. “Programme on the TV, finished a few years ago now but it was about a conspiracy within the FBI to hide evidence of aliens and a man who spent his life trying to prove their existence because he believed his sister was taken by them when they were kids.”

“Never seen it, but then I don't watch much TV.”

“Really? Anyway, in the programme the aliens were always little grey men.”

It was Jack's turn to laugh. “I don't think I've ever met an alien that I could described as small and grey.”

“Well, that's good to know, it would be boring if they all looked the same.”

“There are so many species out there I couldn't even start to list them all and not all of them are like that weevil down there, most of them are beautiful, peaceful and friendly.”

“So the weevils, where to they come from?”

“No idea, never been to wherever they originate from but they seem to make a habit of falling through the rift.”

Christopher looked at Jack thoughtfully for a few moments. “There's a lot more to you than your telling us, isn't there?”

“In what way?” Jack asked.

“I can't put my finger in it, just little things like the way you talk about aliens, like you've not just encountered them from them falling through the rift as you put it, like you've been to other planets. There's something about the way you react to Dafydd like he reminds you of something and your eyes, behind the sadness there's a tiredness that belongs to someone of a greater age than you appear to be.”

“Maybe you're just trying to give me an interesting back story?”

“No, I don't think so.”

“Thanks for the tea.” Jack replied, effectively ending the conversation and dismissing Christopher.

“You're welcome.” He replied, giving Jack one last glance before leaving his office.

Jack moved back across the room and sank down onto his chair, taking a long sip of his tea. He really did miss coffee but he wasn't ready to allow himself the luxury of enjoying it again yet.

He wasn't ready to tell his new team his secrets, he still barely knew them and he didn't give them up easily even to people he knew and loved. Gwen had found out by accident that he couldn't die and that was before any of the other team members knew.

Jack knew he would have to tell them at some point, getting killed would probably happen whether he liked it or not and he wouldn't wish the shock of him coming back to life without warning on anyone. He had learnt that lesson a long time ago.

As for the rest of his life, that could wait even longer. They didn't need to know he was from the future, as far as he knew they didn't know anything about the existence of the Doctor or Time Lords and he wanted to keep it that way for now.

First he needed to train them how he needed them to be, he knew they would all probably be proficient in the use of firearms having been employees of the FBI but he still felt he needed to test them.

Taking his wallet from his pocket Jack took the photo of him and Ianto out, brushing his thumb slowly over the image of Ianto he felt a tear fall down his face.

“I miss you so much.” Jack whispered. “I miss you just being with me, I miss your smile, hell I miss your sarcasm but most of all I miss having you in my arms. Some days I think I can still sense you around me, your unique scent hanging in the air but I look around and your not there.”

Jack wiped away the tear and put the photo back safely in his wallet. “I'll never love anyone else like I love you Ianto Jones.” He whispered into the stillness of his office before getting to his feet and going back to join his new team.

TBC


	7. Chapter 7

Jack slumped down wearily on the sofa in his pristine apartment, it had now been a week since he had arrived in DC and four days since he'd captured his first US weevil.

Since catching the weevil nothing else had come through the rift so Jack had spent the days since connecting a proximity alarm to the base as it had nothing to warn of intruders, despite assurances from Charlie that base was completely secure and showing Dafydd how to make the weevil spray using the instructions on the Torchwood Three database.

Taking each of them into the firing range one by one Jack was reassured that they were all excellent shots, Angela had tried to take the opportunity of being alone with Jack to try and flirt with him but Jack was completely oblivious to it, unfortunately what almost broke him was something Christopher had said to him.

While Jack was stood close by as she showed off his marksmanship he made a remark about Jack's pheromones, using almost the same words that Ianto had when they were capturing Myfanwy, asking where he could get the same aftershave.

Fortunately for Jack, Christopher was the last one down in the firing range. Jack gulped back his feelings, told him they didn't make it anymore and that he was free to go. Jack left the base soon after and went back to his apartment, which was where he was now wondering just how he was going to survive without Ianto.

Jack reached for the phone beside the sofa and dialled a number that was ingrained in his memory, not having to wait long before it was answered.

“Hey.” Jack said simply.

“Jack? How's it going? How's the US of A?”

Even though Jack had called him he was still thrown by hearing his friends voice.

“Jack, you there?”

“Yeah, sorry Rhys.”

“You okay?”

“I'm fine.”

“You don't sound fine Jack.”

“No, actually I'm not, I'm not sure I should have left Cardiff.”

“Job no good?”

“The opposite, the people I'm working with are all good people, the base is perfect and the apartment I'm staying it great, it's just ...”

“It means nothing without Ianto.” Rhys finished for him. “I know how you feel mate.”

“I know, that's why I called you, I hope you don't mind? I know you're in the same boat ...”

“Yes, I am but I have my own and Gwen's family to talk to, you're in a strange country with strange people, of course I don't mind.”

“How are you coping Rhys?”

“To tell the truth, I'm not. I tried to go back to work, thought it might take my mind off things a bit but I kept bursting into tears when I thought about the fact Gwen wouldn't be waiting for me at home.”

“I keep being told I can't escape from grief, everyone was right, it just followed me here.”

“Then maybe you should come back home.” Rhys told him. “Being with people you know might help.”

“There's only you, I'm not saying that's a bad thing but everyone else has gone. Ianto's family hate me, they all blame me for his death.”

“I'm sure they don't Jack ...”

“Did you see the way they were with me at the funeral? They told me in no uncertain terms that they wish they could have stopped me from attending, they tolerated me being there.”

“It wasn't your fault Jack, you all died, didn't you?”

“Yeah, and I came back to the carnage and there was nothing I could do to save them, that image will never leave me.” Jack paused and Rhys could hear his gulp down the phone. “I wish I could have died with them.”

“And who would there be to protect the world from aliens, you're immortal for that very reason, after all these years I truly believe that, that it was meant to be.”

“Doesn't mean I have to be happy about it.”

“I don't blame you Jack, you know that, don't you? Gwen knew the risks of the job, as did I and I'll never hold it against you.”

“That helps, it really does, albeit only a little bit.”

“It'll get better with time, that's what I keep getting told.”

“It will, I guess. I've loved and lost before but with Ianto, it was like we were soul mates.”

“We'll never forget them Jack, they'll be in out hearts forever.”

“Yeah.”

“I have to go Jack, it's almost 2am here, will you be okay?”

“I didn't think, did I wake you?”

“No, I was drinking beer and feeling sorry for myself but I think the alcohol is taking effect now, I need to crash out.”

“Thanks Rhys.”

“What for?”

“Listening.”

“Sometime soon you'll be doing to same for me I expect. Night Jack.”

“Yeah, night Rhys.”

Once Jack replaced the telephone's receiver he headed for the small bar, opened the door and contemplated the contents. He could do the same as Rhys, drink himself into unconsciousness.

He closed the door again empty handed and headed for the bathroom, turning on the bath taps and adding some of the bubble bath that had been provided when he had moved in.

While the bath filled Jack moved to the kitchen, filled a pint glass with water and grabbed a book from his bedroom before heading back to the bathroom.

Jack tested the water's temperature, turned off the taps and sunk below the bubbles into the hot water. His book forgotten as he closed his eyes and let the water surround and comfort his body for a few minutes until his mind wandered back to Ianto.

Jack's thoughts moved to three days before Ianto died, they had spent the best part of the day along with Gwen chasing a humanoid alien with tentacles instead of arms. They hadn't wished it any harm, as far as they knew it hadn't done anything wrong but when they cornered it it turned violent and Gwen had shot it, showering them all in a yellow goo that smelled strangely of lemons as it seemed to explode completely.

Parting company with Gwen they had gone to Ianto's flat to clean up before returning to the hub as it was closer and they had found themselves a little more than distracted when Ianto ran a bath instead of showering quickly as he had intended.

Jack sighed softly to himself as he remembered what had followed, every word and action. Without even thinking about what he was doing Jack's hand moved over his own chest, fingers rubbing softly over a nipple as he thought about Ianto sat between his legs in the bath, leaning back against his chest as his stroked his fingers through his soft chest hair.

_“I could stay here like this forever.” Ianto murmured as Jack's fingers teased his nipples._

_“We'd get cold and wrinkly.” Jack chuckled softly in his ear._

_“As long as I was here with you, I wouldn't care.” Ianto replied._

_“I'd rather stay in bed forever, much more comfortable and a darn sight warmer.”_

_“Sounds like a good alternative, anywhere as long as it's with you.”_

_Jack kissed the side of Ianto's neck feeling the younger man tremble at the touch of his lips, kissing the same spot again before biting down and sucking on the tender skin as Ianto moaned softly._

_“The things you do to me.” Ianto mumbled, turning his head and tilting it for a kiss._

_“I'll never get tired of you, your body even when you're old and grey.”_

_“When I have saggy man boobs and a saggy arse to match?”_

_“You'll be just as adorable.”_

_Jack wrapped an around around Ianto tight and pulled him closer, Ianto could feel Jack's arousal pressing on his lower back. Reaching for Jack's hand he pulled it to his own erection, letting out a loud moan of pleasure as Jack wrapped his hand around it and began to stroke slowly but firmly._

_Ianto's eyes were tightly closed as he felt Jack's arm leave his body and heard the small noises of bottles of toiletries on the small shelf over the bath being moved about and knew Jack was reaching for the waterproof lube._

_Once Jack had his prize in his possession he clutched it tightly in his hand as he pulled Ianto onto his lap, coated his fingers and slid his hand between his bodies seeking the small tight muscle that nestled between the cheeks of Ianto's arse._

_Ianto lent forward a little giving Jack a little more access, letting out a gasp as Jack's finger breached his hole, feeling the sensations as Jack added a second and began to work them in and out his body._

_“You have a beautiful arse, inside and out.” Jack whispered huskily in Ianto's ear._

_“And your gorgeous cock fits into it perfectly.” Ianto whispered back._

_“Is that an invitation?”_

_“No, an order ... Sir!”_

_“Well, when you put it like that.” Jack replied, sliding his fingers from Ianto's arse, his other hand abandoning Ianto's cock so he could grasp Ianto's hips._

_As Jack lifted Ianto body Ianto reached back between his own legs, finding Jack's cock and aligning it with his own hole as Jack slowly lowered his body until he was impaled completely on Jack's cock._

_Jack pressed one hand to Ianto's chest as the other resumed it's position around Ianto's cock as Ianto placed his hands on either side of the bath, knees bent as he used the leverage to ride Jack's cock._

_As they lost themselves in their ecstasy the only sounds were of flesh hitting flesh, the splashing of water as he fell over the side of the bath onto the tiled floor and the moans of pleasure as they both sped towards their releases._

_“Jack!” Ianto yelled out loudly as he came, his come spilling into the water, his arse contracting around Jack's cock sending Jack over the edge, biting down on the nape of Ianto's neck as he pumped his release into his lover._

_Jack wound both his arms tightly around Ianto, his forehead resting on his back as they both panted softly, waiting for their heartbeats to return to normal before either of them spoke._

_“How come we always get dirty getting clean?” Ianto mumbled, pressing into Jack's embrace._

_“Because it's so much more fun that just getting clean.”_

_“You are a bad influence on me Harkness.”_

_“And you love it Jones.”_

_“We should get clean, Gwen will be wondering where we've got to.”_

_“She'll know exactly where we've got to, she's known us too long to think anything other than what we've been doing.”_

_“That's what worries me.” Ianto replied, blushing a little pink._

_“I love that you still blush, after all this time.”_

_“I know.” Ianto chuckled._

Jack's eyes flew open suddenly, a little surprised to find his hand wrapped tightly around his cock in the cooling water, his cock hard. After all the other dreams and daydreams he had had he had not had any kind of sexual response physically, no matter how erotic the memories had been.

Feeling a little guilty Jack's hand stilled, wanking off over a daydream, a memory of his dead lover seemed a little wrong somehow but somewhere in the back of his mind he could hear Ianto's voice telling him he didn't mind, that it was only to be expected after remembering time they spent together.

Jack tried to think of something else, anything but Ianto but it didn't work, his cock was so hard it was aching for release. Closing his eyes again he focused on Ianto's face in his head, imaging he was gazing deep into Ianto's eyes as he began to stroke his cock faster and faster, his hips thrusting upwards in the water as he came with a loud groan, his come shooting over the water that covered his torso and then lying limply as tears filled his eyes.

All Jack could think now was how he could never feel Ianto's touch again, never feel his lips on his own, the pleasure of being buried inside him or of Ianto being ball deep in his own body. Tear pouring down his face Jack pulled the plug out and climbed out of the bath.

Grabbing a towel from the rack Jack wrapped it around his dripping body, left the bathroom and headed for the bedroom. Without even attempting to dry his body Jack dropped onto the bed, curled into a ball and sobbed himself to sleep.

TBC


	8. Chapter 8

Dafydd ran around a corner and screeched to an abrupt halt.

“Jack, Jack, it's here.” He hissed into his comm watching the creature before him as he devoured a shrub he had pulled from the earth.

“Where are you?” Jack yelled back into his ear.

“Far end of the memorials, near the fence of the White House.”

“On our way.” Jack told him, telling the others to head to where Dafydd instructed.

Jack reached him first, Angela and Christopher hot on his heels.

“What the hell is that?” Angela asked, watching as the alien pulled another shrub from the ground and began to munch it's way through it.

“A Hoix, not particularly a danger in the sense of it being a ruthless killer, a bit dim and it will eat anything.” Jack told them.

“So, we catch it?” Christopher asked.

“Yeah.” Jack replied pulling out a syringe with enough sedative to stop an elephant. “Okay, you three distract it and I'll sedate it.”

The three team members moved into the creatures line of sight, it ambled towards them more out of interest as to whether they might have something it could eat than anything else as Jack crept behind it.

As soon as Jack felt it was safe Jack approached quietly from behind and jabbed the needle of the syringe into the back of the Hoix's neck, it's paused for a second, letting out a cry of confusion before dropping to the ground unconscious.

“Dafydd, bring the SUV round, it's way too heavy for us to carry all the way back to the base.” Jack told him. “Thank goodness it decided to go on it's feeding rampage in the middle of the night.”

“Some would see it that way.” Angela yawned.

Jack chuckled. “It won't be long before day and night don't seem like separate identities any more.”

“I already have no life.” Christopher sighed as Dafydd pulled up in the SUV.

It took all four of them to manoeuvre the Hoix in the the SUV and then carry it down into the hub and put it in the cell next to the weevil.

“It should wake soon and it'll be hungry.” Jack told them. “We'll keep it fed until the rift opens again and then send it back through.”

“You said it eats anything?” Angela asked.

“Anything.” Jack replied.

“Then I'll go and see what I can find and put it in the cell before it wakes.” Angela replied.

“Why haven't we sent Tim back through the rift?” Christopher asked a little later as they sat on the chairs in the small kitchen.

“I'm used to having a weevil around, I guess Tim is a replacement for Janet.” Jack shrugged.

“You had a weevil called Janet in Torchwood three?” Dafydd asked.

“Yeah, Ianto and I met ... yeah and a Pterodactyl called Myfanwy, although Ianto ... Ianto would insist she was a Petrodon.”

None of them missed the sudden sadness that took over Jack's voice and expression.

“You had a pet Pterodactyl? That is so cool!” Angela exclaimed trying to lighten the mood again.

“It kinda is, yeah.” Jack agreed but his mood was still evident. “Okay kids, time to go home and try and get some sleep.”

“Not much of the night left.” Christopher replied, looking at his watch.

“No one comes back till lunchtime, unless something goes down.” Jack told them.

“Thanks.” Angela replied, looking at the other, none of them moving and all thinking the same, that they didn't think it was a good idea to leave Jack alone.

“Jack.” Christopher started a little hesitantly. “It's two weeks now, we still barely know anything about you and you know everything about us.”

“I wouldn't know where to start.” Jack replied, trying to brush him off lightly.

“Something, tell us anything?” Angela asked.

“I wish I had never left Cardiff.” Jack admitted. “Don't get me wrong, you guys are great but I should never have left so soon after ...”

“Losing the man you loved?” Dafydd finished for him, not letting on to the others what Jack had already confided in him about.

Jack nodded. “I had no family, Ianto's family blamed me and Torchwood but trying to run away from my grief wasn't a good idea.”

“Is there no one there you can talk to, remember his with?” Christopher asked.

“Rhys, he was Gwen's husband, she died in the same attack.”

“He doesn't blame you?” Angela asked.

“No, he knew the risks and accepted that it was Gwen's choice to keep working for Torchwood.”

“Have you spoken to him, since you left?” She asked.

“About a week ago, I just ended up feeling more ... homesick.”

“I'm sorry.” Angela replied, reaching out to place a comforting hand on Jack's arm.

“Losing anyone is hard, I should be used to it by now.”

“Not something anyone ever gets used to.” Christopher told him.

“Maybe, but I've had more practice than most people, I thought that though some miracle Ianto and I would have more time together before he left me.”

“Lost because of Torchwood?” Angela asked.

“No, well yes, but other reasons too.” Jack replied, not ready to elaborate about the length of his life so far.

“I should never have asked, I'm sorry.” Angela told him.

“It's okay, honestly, I'm told talking out it helps ease the pain.”

“And does it?”

“Ask me again another time.” Jack told her sadly.

“We should go.” Christopher stated, needed to try stop Jack feeling even more upset.

“Yes, go and sleep.” Jack replied, getting to his feet and effectively dismissing them.

Jack headed straight to his office as the others collected their belongings, sinking into his chair he knew he should take his own advice and head back to his apartment to try and get some rest but after the talk they had just had he couldn't face going back to the empty bed it contained.

Leaning forwards Jack rested his head in his arms and closed his eyes, try and he might he couldn't stop the tears that escaped from them. Silent tears that just escaped from his eyes and dripped onto his bare wrists, not hearing the quiet footsteps that approached.

Dafydd knocked lightly on the door frame, the door wide open.

“Can I get you anything when I come back?” Dafydd asked.

Jack shook his head without looking up. “Nothing that's possible anyway.”

“They, we all feel bad that we've upset you.”

“Seems like everything does at the moment, everywhere I look, everyday.” Jack told him, finally looking up with red rimmed eyes.

Dafydd moved towards him, pulling a clean handkerchief from his pocket and offering it to Jack. Jack looked at the offered item and then into Dafydd's eyes.

“You are so like him you know, in more than a few ways.” Jack told him, taking the handkerchief and wiping his eyes.

“Ianto?”

“Thoughtful, caring ... Welsh.” Jack tried to chuckle but failed miserably. “I need to get out of here.”

Jack got to his feet and made to walk past Dafydd, Dafydd stopped him with a hand to his arm.

“You shouldn't be alone while you're feeling like this, come on, I know somewhere we can go.”

“I'm not your problem.” Jack replied.

“No, but as you said, I'm like my cousin and in that respect I want to try and help.”

Jack pondered for a few moments. “Where we going?”

“Small club I know, it's open all night, a drink 'ill do us both good.”

“I don't drink.”

“One isn't going to kill you.” Dafydd told him, leading the way out the base.

The club was within walking distance, little more than twenty minutes later they were sat inside it's plush interior with drinks before them.

After being pushed Jack had agreed to have a scotch and surprised himself by downing it in one going, gasping as it burnt it's way down his throat and not protesting when Dafydd ordered a second and then a third watching as Jack became gradually relaxed by the alcohol circulating through his body.

“You don't have to tell us anything you don't want us to know.” Dafydd told him, feeling a little tipsy himself as he tried to match Jack drink for drink.

“There's something I need to tell you all, before you find out for yourselves.”

“Something bad?”

“Sometimes I think so, I certainly did the night Ianto and Gwen got killed.”

“What is it?”

“I have to tell you all at the same time, it's a long story.”

“Soon?”

“Yeah, I guess so.” Jack replied downing the last of his third drink.

“Another one?” Dafydd asked, holding his glass aloft and gesturing to the waiter.

“In for a penny in for a pound.” Jack told him.

Two more drinks later and Dafydd could tell Jack was getting to the point where he would pass out soon, not used to drinking so much alcohol in such a short time.

Dafydd asked the waiter to call a cab for them, intending to use it to drop Jack off at his apartment and then take him home.

By the time the cab pulled up outside Jack's apartment building Jack was barely capable of walking, Dafydd paid the driver and helped Jack inside, deciding to get Jack settled and then call for another cab to take him home.

Jack fumbled in his pocket for his key and handed it to Dafydd, who also had a little trouble getting it into the lock thanks to his intoxicated state but he was more used to drinking that Jack and git them inside relatively quickly, closing the door behind them and dumping Jack unceremoniously on one of the sofas before heading to the kitchen.

Dafydd flicked the kettle on and got two mugs from the cupboard and made them both strong cups of tea, walking back into the living room he found Jack sprawled on the sofa, boots and all.

He put the mugs down on the coffee table and moved to unlace Jack's boots, Jack didn't even acknowledge his presence until he was pulling them off his feet and then sat back up looking at him curiously.

“Jack, I made you a drink.” Dafydd told him, reaching for the mug.

“Ianto, you came back to me.” Jack slurred.

“It's me Dafydd.”

“I'd know those eyes anywhere.” Jack replied before reaching up and grabbing Dafydd by the t shirt and pulling him down, kissing him desperately before Dafydd had a chance to react.

Dafydd's first though was of shock, then of how being kissed by a man wasn't so different to being kissed by a woman. Even when Jack's tongue invaded his mouth he never pushed him away repulsed, no that happened when Jack's hand moved to his crotch and pressed to his flaccid cock through the fabric of his jeans.

“Jack stop.” Dafydd told him, pushing him backwards. “You're drunk and you don't know what you're doing.”

“You're not Ianto, Ianto's not American.” Jack replied confused.

“No, I'm Dafydd and you need to sleep this off.”

“Yeah.” Jack nodded, still confused as he got to his feet and walked unsteadily to his bedroom.

Dafydd checked on him a couple of minuted later and found Jack flat out on top of the bed, fully dressed and snoring softly. Checking the alarm clock next to the bed he turned it off and crept from the room, Jack needed all the sleep he could get he thought to himself.

Deciding to walk home Dafydd headed for the door, as he left he couldn't miss the words that Jack mumbled in his sleep.

“I love you Ianto, love you forever.”

TBC


	9. Chapter 9

Jack tossed the two painkillers into his mouth and swallowed them with a large gulp of water, he'd forgotten just how nasty hangovers could feel and drinking the night before wasn't the only thing he was regretting.

It didn't even seep slowly into his consciousness, it was there in his head when he woke. He had kissed Dafydd, yes, he had been drunk, way too drunk but that was no excuse. Jack was sure Dafydd wouldn't even mention it let alone make him feel guilty but he was doing a good job of that by himself.

Jack couldn't help but give a small, sad chuckle to himself as he thought how he now knew for certain that Dafydd was straight, his body hadn't reacted in the slightest to the kiss or his pheromones, even if he didn't push him off straight away.

Hell, a good kiss was a good kiss no matter who was giving it Jack told himself, trying to make himself feel better about the whole thing.

Putting the empty water glass in the kitchen sink Jack walked through to the living room and slumped on the sofa wishing he could find the energy to motivate himself and lifted the lid of his laptop, checking his email should distract his mind for a while he decided.

Ten minutes later he was still staring at the title of the unread email as if he thought his addled mind was playing tricks on him. His finger hovered over the mouse pad, unsure whether he should actually read it or delete it.

Deciding that the title made it just that little bit too intriguing to delete he clicked on the email from Ianto's sister Rhiannon that was entitled “Please read Jack, please.”

Jack closed his eyes and took a deep breath as he anticipated what was to come and then while massaging his temple with the fingers and thumb of one hand he began to read.

_Jack,_

_I'm sorry._

_I'm sorry it's taken me so long to write this, I should have come and seen you before you left for the states, I can understand completely why you left but I wish you had just hung around for a little longer._

_I'm sorry for the way my family, Ianto's family have treated you. I wanted so badly at the funeral to take your hand and comfort you but my family would have made such a fuss and I didn't want Ianto's send off to be spoilt by their bad manners._

_When they refused to go to your CP five years ago (Yes, I know it's nearly your anniversary) I was so angry, they still have no idea that we attended, Johnny and I and you have no idea how much I glossed over the reason they didn't attend, I know Ianto was hurt badly by their refusal to accept you as his partner._

_I don't blame you or Torchwood for his death, he died in the line of duty, for his country as he once told me. Yes, I know all about Torchwood and what you do. Ianto told me, he knew he could trust me not to tell another living soul, not even Johnny knows what he divulged to me that day._

_It was his choice to work for Torchwood, no one forced him to stay, I know my brother, he was much to stubborn for that and I know enough about you to know that losing him that way was the worst thing that could have happened, that losing him through old age wouldn't have even seemed so bad as you would have got to spend so much more of your long life with him._

_Yes Jack, I know all about you too, my brother was besotted from the first day he met you. He told me everything, even about Lisa eventually. I hope you're not too shocked? Hell, you can't be as shocked as I was when he told me just exactly how old you were, my parents didn't know just how true it was when they said they thought you were too old for him, did they?_

_It's a shame you never gave me a niece or nephew, something that would have been a part of Ianto for both of us to love. I think that learning of the fact that you were able to conceive and have a child was even more of a shock than your seemingly eternal life._

_I hope you read this, I miss you, I really do and I think if you were still here it might feel like a small piece of Ianto was here too. If you don't reply I'll understand, either you were too scared to open this or you're not ready to respond._

_But I hope to receive a reply, even if it's just to let me know you're doing okay. Somehow I doubt that because I know I'm not, I was his sister but you were his friend, lover, husband and I know if I lost Johnny I would be devastated._

_I hope Torchwood Five is helping? Yes, I have my ways and means that if you knew Ianto had told me about you'd have been furious, but it's helped me track you down and for that I am very grateful._

_If you want, need to come back to Wales, we will make you welcome._

_Lots of Love,_   
_Rhiannon._

By the time Jack had finished reading tears were pouring so hard he had to keep brushing them away with the back of his hand so he could see the screen properly. Even though Rhiannon had attended the wedding and had always seemed supportive of them when she ignored him at the funeral he was sure she felt the same way as the rest of the Jones family.

He already knew by the time he had even read half the email that he was going to respond but he wasn't ready to do so just yet. He needed time to think about what he was going to say, to say it had been a revelation that Ianto had told her everything about him was an understatement.

Jack clicked on the reply button and sent her a simple message, hoping that she would realise it would be followed by a proper email at some point.

_Rhiannon,_

_Thank you._

_Love,_   
_Jack._

Clicking the send button before he had the chance to change his mind he settled back on the sofa and realised his headache had subsided almost completely, after rereading the email once more Jack closed the laptop and got to his feet.

Jack showered, shaved and dressed. He couldn't put going to work off any longer, he wasn't going to avoid Dafydd or pretend what he had done the night before hadn't happened he was going to face him and apologise and promise him it would never happen again.

He also told himself as he left his apartment that he would never be drinking large amounts of alcohol again, that alone would help him keep his promise. As soon as he arrived at the base he found Dafydd in the medical bay and asked him to come to his office, ignoring the looks of the others as he led the way.

“I'm sorry, about last night.” Jack told him as soon as he shut the door to his office.

“Forget about it, I have.” Dafydd replied shrugging, not looking at all worried at being alone with Jack.

“It should never have happened, I was drunk, pissed really but that's no excuse for what I did.”

“Jack, I promise you I won't hold it against you. It's fine.”

“Ianto used to say that, all the time.” Jack told him sadly.

“Say what?”

“It's fine, even though half the time he meant the complete opposite.”

“Not me, when I say 'It's fine' I mean it.”

“And I believe you, I do, it's just ...”

“I remind you of him.”

“If it's any consolation, it was one hell of a kiss, even if it didn't do anything for me.” Dafydd chuckled softly.

Jack looked at him as if he couldn't believe that he had just said and then burst out laughing, that small statement defusing the atmosphere Jack was creating completely.

“Don't ever let me drink again!” Jack told him, sitting down behind his desk.

“Water only.” Dafydd replied. “Jack, anytime you want to talk, I'll listen.”

Jack nodded. “I got an email this morning, from Ianto's sister.” He confided.

“Did she upset you, are you okay?”

“Yeah, I discovered that she didn't feel the same way about Ianto and I as the rest of her family, I was so upset at the funeral when she gave me the cold shoulder like the rest of the family but she was warned to stay away from me.”

“She should have told them what she thought of them, supported you.” Dafydd replied, angry for Jack.

“No, I'm just glad to know she only did it because of them, Ianto was so close to his sister, closer than I ever knew and I liked her a lot. At least I still have one connection with Ianto, through her.”

“Did you reply?”

“Not properly, I just sent a short message saying thank you, I'll email her properly when I feel like I can do it without falling apart, again.”

“It's barely a month since his funeral Jack, falling apart is normal.”

“I guess.”

“If I can get through next week without doing anything stupid I know I'm on my way to ... coping.”

“Next week?”

“Next Wednesday would have been the fifth anniversary of our wedding.” Jack replied, sadness filling him again.

“Will be, not would be.” Dafydd told him resolutely. “Use it to celebrate his life, not mourn his death.”

“I'm not sure I can ...”

“Yes, you can Jack, you need to do this.”

“How?”

“Whatever seems right to you, only you can decide that.”

“I'll think about it.”

“That's a start.” Dafydd told, walking towards the office door. “Tea?”

“Thanks.” Jack replied, almost replying that he'd prefer coffee but he just couldn't bring himself to say so just yet.

As Jack watched the others going about their various tasks in the hub he couldn't help going over Rhiannon's email in his head, he could remember it almost word for word even though he had only read it through twice.

Turning his computer on Jack logged into his email again and read it a third and then a fourth time devouring every word, barely acknowledging Dafydd when he put the mug of tea on his desk. If he wondered why Jack had his hand pressed to his belly he never questioned it.

Jack was focused on the paragraph where Rhiannon had mentioned that it was a shame he had never given her a niece or nephew, he and Ianto had been discussing the idea of children in the two or three weeks before he had been killed, they had both been excited by the idea but had no idea how to reverse the inhibitor he had in his body to prevent accidental pregnancy when he was still in the 51st century and now it was too late.

Jack closed the email and brushed away the tears that had fallen unnoticed down his cheeks with his fingers before getting to his feet, after draining his luke warm cup of tea he headed out his office and into the main base.

It was time he decided, time to tell the people he worked with just who Jack Harkness was.

tbc


	10. Chapter 10

Jack ushered his team into the kitchen area, he didn't want to do this in the boardroom as it wasn't work related and he wanted more of a relaxed atmosphere.

They settled down in the comfy chairs and looked at Jack expectanly, not knowing what was coming but none of them missing how nervous he seemed to be.

“Where to start.” Jack said with a small chuckle, feeling strangely nervous. “Okay, lets start with my age, how old would you think I was?”

“Early to mid forties?” Angela guessed.

“I wish, I'm actually more than two thousand years old, to be a little more exact over two thousand, one hundred and fifty.”

“No fucking way!” Exclaimed Dafydd as the others gasped in agreement.

“That's just ridiculous.” Christopher added.

“No one can live that long.” Angela retorted.

“I am, also I'm not from this time, I'm from the future, 51st century.”

“People live that long by then?” Angela asked aghast.

“No, that's another story.”

“Spill.” Dafydd told him.

“There was this man.” Jack began as the others gave a small whoop of excitement. “When I met him I was a different person, a conman.”

“So you fell in love with him and changed?” Asked Christopher.

“I did love him, do love him but not in the way you mean, no.”

“He's old too?” Dafydd asked.

“Not as old as I am, he's over 900 years old and although he looks like you or me he's not human, he's a Time Lord.” Jack explained.

“The Doctor?” Christopher asked.

“You know about the Doctor?”

“Hey, researcher here, give me something to research and I'm there. As soon as I was asked to become part of Torchwood I researched all I could and found out about Queen Victoria, how she formed Torchwood to protect us against the aliens and a man called the Doctor and his companion Rose.” Christopher replied.

“Anything else?”

“No much to be honest, there's a lot of rumours, some say he causes chaos wherever he goes, some say he's saved the earth more times than I've had hot dinners.”

“He has. Rose was ... she was wonderful.”

“You knew her?” Angela asked.

“I travelled with them for a while, she's the reason I can't die.”

“Wait, so your saying that not only are you over two thousand years old you can't die? Ever?” Dafydd asked.

“Technically I can die, I just don't stay dead.”

“And this is because of Rose?” Angela asked.

“We were fighting these aliens, Dalek's and I was killed, but Rose opened the heart of the TARDIS and took the vortex in to her and used it to bring me back to life.”

“TARDIS?” Dafydd asked.

“The Doctor's time machine.” Christopher replied smugly.

“Time and relative dimension in space.” Jack added.

“So that's why you can't die?” Angela asked, wanting to get back on the subject.

“Yes, the vortex energy is what prevents me from dying, staying dead.”

“You must have seen so much in that time.” Angela replied.

“For most of the two thousand years I was buried alive and then frozen.” Jack shuddered at the thought. “But that really is a story for another time.”

“But you can't not tell us after that?” Angela told him.

“Sorry, it's personal.” Jack told her resolutely.

“What's it like, dying?” Christopher asked. “What do you see?”

“Nothing, just blackness.”

“Nothing, no heaven, no hell, just blackness?” Angela asked, sounding a little freaked.

“Yeah, but it could just be like that for me because I come back.” Jack shrugged.

“Does coming back hurt?” Dafydd asked.

“Yes, it's not one of the most pleasant experiences I ever have to go through.”

“So you won't be giving us a demonstration then?” Christopher asked.

“No.” Jack told him, his tone telling him to leave it.

“Anything else you should tell us?” Dafydd asked.

“Nothing that can affect the way we work, I just wanted you to know in case I got killed by something, coming back to life after I've been pronounced dead can be a little bit of a shock for people.”

“I think you should tell them, about my link to Ianto.” Dafydd told him.

“Are you sure?” Jack asked him.

“Yep.” He relied in a way that reminded him of Ianto so much.

“Okay, I never knew it when I took this job but the man I loved, lost ... Ianto, he was Dafydd's cousin.” Jack gulped back the tears that threatened to well in his eyes.

“Bloody hell, talk about small world.” Christopher exclaimed.

“Yeah.” Jack replied. “Never expected to find an relative here, let alone have one working for me.”

“It's not going affect how either of us work, I just thought it shouldn't be a secret.” Dafydd told them.

“And you're right.” Jack replied, getting to his feet. “Okay, work to do.”

Jack watched them all as they left the kitchen area, he knew he would be the subject of gossip among them now but he didn't care, most of his secrets were now out in the open.

Feeling like he needed some fresh air Jack told them he was going out for a while, that he would have his comm and mobile phone on him at all times but he was taking the SUV and would be back if he was needed.

As Jack drove he found himself turning as if to say something to Ianto and then catching himself just before he spoke, ignoring the tears that ran down his cheeks Jack just kept driving, not really knowing where he was heading until he reached the coast.

He had no idea where he was, just the urge to be by the sea as if it somehow would bring him closer to Ianto, he missed being by the sea. 

He just miss the sea, he missed Cardiff, he missed Myfanwy and even Janet. He knew he would be going back at some point, he didn't feel at home in the US.

The team were proving themselves to be very good at their jobs, training them was proving easier than he thought which he knew was probably due to them being with the FBI originally.

They had all the resources of Torchwood Three available to them and from what he had seen Dafydd would make a great leader, and he knew it wasn't that he was biased towards him because of Ianto, the young man had potential.

Jack made his decision at the exact moment, he would stay as long as it would take to train them to the point he was happy with and he was going to ask Charlie if he wanted to become one of the team as leaving four behind would be better than three the next time he saw him.

Going home, back to Cardiff at anytime was going to be hard but he knew that taking this job had just been an excuse to run away and if he was going to start coming to terms with his loss he needed to be there.

Getting back in the SUV Jack headed back to the base, it was going to talk him a good couple of hours as he hadn't realised just how far he had driven, feeling better in himself than he had for the first time since losing Ianto.

TBC


	11. Chapter 11

Jack moved to the huge picture window and drew the heavy drapes against the bright setting sun for the first time shadowing the room in semi darkness before moving across the room and lighting the two scented candles on the coffee table.

Next he went to the kitchen, taking the bottle of champagne from the fridge and setting it on the worktop before picking up the ice bucket and half filling it with ice before adding the bottle to the mix.

Taking two champagne glasses from the kitchen cabinet Jack went back to the living room and placed them on the table with the candles before heading into his bedroom.

Kneeling on the floor Jack reached under the bed and pulled out the suitcase he had stowed beneath it, lifting it onto the bed he slowly stroked a hand over it before opening the lid.

Reaching inside Jack first pulled out the framed photograph, a larger version of the picture he kept in his wallet of his and Ianto on the day of their wedding, this was followed by a red silk tie and finally Ianto's journal.

Leaving the case on top of the bed Jack got to his feet and carried the items through to the living room, placing the framed photograph so it could be seen clearly in the candlelight and the journal next to it.

Jack ran the tie though his fingers, he hadn't brought any other personal items of Ianto's with him. The tie and the journal were two of the things that most defined his lover, he needed nothing else, except for the man himself.

Hanging the tie loosely around his neck Jack took the champagne bottle from the ice bucket and opened it, pouring the sparkling liquid in the both glasses before setting it back.

Placing one glass next to the Ianto in the photograph Jack took the other in his hand and held it aloft, gathering every single ounce of self control he spoke into the air.

“Happy Anniversary cariad.” Jack's voice was barely above a whisper. “I miss you more and more each day.”

Jack gulped down the champagne in one swallow and put the glass back on the table before slumping onto the sofa as his emotions got the better of him and tears began to pour down his face.

Hugging a cushion to his chest Jack just let them fall, indulging himself in his moment of sadness wondering if he would ever be happy again.

It was some time later when Jack took notice of the journal again, Ianto had bought it before their wedding and had written his first entry the day they returned from their short but perfect honeymoon.

Until now Jack hadn't been able to bring himself to read it, he wasn't even sure if he should have bought it with him from Cardiff but it seemed to be calling out to him.

Jack kicked off his shoes and reached for it, leaning back against the cushions and putting his feet up Jack got comfortable and opened the journal to the first page and began to read.

I don't think I've ever been so happy in my life, it may have only been a weekend long honeymoon but they were such wonderful, perfect days I wish we could have stayed there forever, in bed, ignoring the whole world.

We've made so many plans, we even talked about having children. Is it so wrong that when I imagine Jack with a big belly, carrying our child I feel so ... turned on? Won't be for a while though, we're going to wait till the time feels right and also Jack has to find a way to reverse the inhibitor that stops him falling pregnant.

I'm so happy I think I'm smiling in my sleep.

Jack smiled at the memory, they had barely left the bedroom for the whole two days and nights. They had made love too many times to remember but they had also just slept holding each other tight and talked, making plans for the future.

Trying not to think about the future they had been denied Jack flipped through a few pages and read a little more.

Jack can he so romantic when he wants to be, this morning he bought me breakfast in bed, so what if the toast was a little burnt and the coffee was bitter it was the thought that counts. One week today, our one week wedding anniversary.

Jack could remember it clearly, Ianto had taken one tiny bite of the toast and screwed up his face at the taste before gulping down a mouth of coffee to get rid of the burnt taste and almost chocked in disgust.

They had ended up making love for hours, not caring that they would be late for work knowing the others would forgive them.

Skipping a few more pages Jack began to read another entry, the writing a little more harsh and less like the normal flowing style Ianto had.

Jack died today, for the first time since our wedding. I know he's going to come back, he always does but there's always this little voice at the back of my mind trying the tell me that maybe this time he will stay dead.

Of course he didn't, he gasped back to life in my arms looking scared and shocked just like always and held me tight as if he was scared he had lost me and not the other way around.

I hate it when Jack dies.

Jack brushed away the tear that slid down his cheek before it could land on the page and mark it, putting it down on the sofa Jack got to his feet and headed into the bathroom, relieving himself before splashing water on his face.

Looking at himself in the bathroom mirror Jack fleetingly wondered how much longer he would look like it was in his early forties, it seemed so unfair that he had all this youth and life and Ianto's had been stolen away from his so early.

Drying his hands and face on the towel Jack headed for the kitchen and poured himself a large glass of water, he never really was a fan of champagne and rummaged around in the kitchen door for some painkillers to nip his blossoming headache in the bud.

Jack took a couple and then moved back to the living room with the rest of the water, placing it on the coffee table before settling back on the sofa and picking up the journal again.

Flicking through Jack found what he was looking for, Ianto's entry about their one year wedding anniversary and smiled to himself as he read it.

Jack's not the only one who can be romantic, he never guessed what I had planned for this evening when he got home from work. We had celebrated in our usual way when we woke and exchanged cards and small gifts but for the evening I wanted to show him just how happy I was.

Luckily Jack was stuck on a call to the prime minister so I was able to make my escape from the hub and get home before him.

His face when he arrived home an hour or so later was worth every minute of it, I cooked him his favourite meal which we ate at the dining table with only a candle to illuminate the room.

As good as the food was we barely touched it, most of the time we were just talking, touching, leaning over to steal kisses until our need got to great and we abandoned the food and almost ran to the bedroom.

Our anniversary was almost as fantastic as our honeymoon, the only thing wrong was the length of time we had, one night was nowhere near long enough for us to both show each other just how much we cared.

Jack closed the journal, the memories although wonderful were all becoming to much for him. Telling himself he would read more the next day Jack blew out the candle and carried the almost full bottle of champagne back to the kitchen, leaving the half full glass behind and tipped the contents down the sink knowing he would never drink the rest.

Leaving the journal on the coffee table Jack picked up the photograph and headed to his bedroom, placing it on his bedside table and then stowing the suitcase back under the bed before stripping his clothes off and climbing into bed naked.

Lying on his side Jack faced the picture, in his head he could hear Ianto's laughter. He wondered how long it would be before it would start to fade, that he wouldn't be able to remember his laugh, his voice, those beautiful Welsh vowels.

Jack told himself to stop thinking like that, that it wasn't going to happen but he knew in his heart it would eventually, he had lost so many people and he knew what to expect.

Focusing on happier thoughts Jack thought back to their wedding day, how they had wanted to run from the reception and be alone but Ianto insisted they had to stay, it would have been rude to leave their own wedding so early.

As a compromise they had snuck up to the honeymoon suite for an hour and had had frantic, desperate sex before searching the room for their discarded, thrown clothes and dressed while they laughed happily before heading back down to the party.

Closing his eyes and rolling onto his back Jack let his hand brush down over his chest, his fingernail catching a nipple as it made his way down the smoothness of his body. When his hand reached his crotch Jack hesitated, he didn't need to look or touch to know he had an erection but it seemed wrong somehow to need a release when he was feeling so sad.

Grabbing the pillow next to him Jack hugged it tight, ignoring his hard on, turning onto his front and burying his face in his pillow and the tears began to fall again.

A small thought crossed his mind before he let himself give into sleep, he had lost so many friends and lovers before but he never remembered being quite so emotional.

Putting it down to never loving anyone as much as he had loved Ianto, Jack fell into a dreamless sleep, exhausted.

TBC


	12. Chapter 12

The following morning after Jack had his morning shower he made a cup of tea and opened the curtains wide letting the early morning light flood into the apartment.

Sitting down on the sofa he couldn't miss Ianto's journal still sitting where he had left it on the coffee table, he resisted it for a good five minutes knowing that reading it would make him sad but in the end he reach for it and thumbed through the pages.

Jack smiled to himself as he read the entry for the fourth wedding anniversary, he could remember the day as if it was yesterday.

Jack is just amazing, not only did it arrange for us to have two whole days off work after checking and rechecking the rift monitor that nothing major was going to happen he booked us into a very swish hotel in London.

I say room, it was a suite, huge bed in one room, bathroom and even it's own little living room. I told him I didn't want to leave it for the whole two days.

Jack surprised me yet again with theatre tickets for that evening, after a quick thank you in the shower we headed into the west end for dinner and then the show before rushing back to the hotel and straight into bed, where we stayed for the whole night and most of the following day.

We only surfaced to shower and order room service as by then we were both starving, man cannot live on sex alone apparently, we did try.

Jack let out a loud chuckle to himself before reading on.

Even while we were eating we were sat close, touching each other and talking. The conversation somehow got round to children again, I don't know which of us brought it up but we made a decision of sorts, we would wait a couple more years and then try and find a way to reverse the effects of Jack's inhibitor.

He tells me it's chemical, that it self replicates in his body and as he had it when he died the first time it's always present when he comes back to life, it's part of him now. Once he starts taking it he'll have to avoid dying, or he'll be back to square one and when he does fall pregnant dying is a big no no.

Oh my god, Jack being pregnant, I'm thinking it as if it's normal? What has Torchwood done to me? Oh hell, I don't care, if I get to have a child with the man I love I don't care one iota that Jack's a man having my baby.

Maybe I can get him to change his mind and try for one sooner, I'll wait and while and then maybe bring the subject up again. I want a child with him more than anything else in the world at the moment, wow.

“Why didn't you tell me?” Jack spoke to the diary, feeling so sad that he had never known just how Ianto had felt on the matter, he'd never pushed the issue when they had spoken about it. “If I'd known I would have agreed, I wanted it just as much.”

Jack closed the diary and carried it to his bedroom, pulling the case out from under the bed and stashing it inside telling himself he was bringing himself nothing but heartache by reading Ianto's thoughts.

He wiped a stray tear from his eye, grabbed his keys and headed out the door. Jack wasn't surprised to find Charlie arriving as he did, having called him the day before as asking to come that morning, telling him he had a proposal for him.

“Morning.” Charlie greeted him cheerfully as Jack came into view. “I'm a little early, I hope that's not a problem.”

“No, not at all.” Jack replied, leading the way through the concealed door and down the steps into the base. “Tea, coffee?”

“Coffee would be great thanks.”

Charlie followed Jack into the kitchen area and sank into one of the comfy chairs as Jack made coffee for Charlie and tea for himself, handing a mug to him before sitting down himself.

“So, what's up?” Charlie asked, sipping his hot coffee.

“I'd like to offer you a job, here.” Jack told him. “We need someone else, someone to help with the day to day running of the place.”

“Dogsbody?”

“No no, okay, I'm going to be honest with you but I need to to keep this between us, the others don't know yet.” Jack replied.

“Sure.”

“Once they are fully trained I'm heading home, back to Cardiff. I need to be with people I love in a city I love.”

“Who's going to lead them, if you leave?”

“Dafydd, from what I've seen he has the potential to make a great boss but he's also the medic so he's going to need someone to help with all the day to day stuff, paperwork etc.”

“How long, till you leave?”

“I think a couple of months, at the most.”

“It's a tempting offer, I know the pay is a darn sight better than the FBI pays.”

“Danger comes with the job, it's the least Torchwood can do to pay their employees well.”

“When would you want me to start, I'd have to give notice, two weeks is normal.”

“There are ways around that, Torchwood has lots of benefits.” Jack grinned.

“Keep talking.”

“No one but the queen has jurisdiction over us, no one can stop us going anywhere or doing anything we need to do to get the job done, not the FBI or the US government.”

“And?”

“We catch aliens, sometimes to help them get home, sometimes regrettably we have to kill them but there are hundreds of species out there, some boring as hell, some brilliant, some gorgeous and some damn ugly but it's never boring.”

“Shame you'll be leaving.” Charlie replied.

“I need to go home, deal with my feelings properly, I can't do that here.” Jack replied, completely missing the look Charlie gave him.

“And no one should deny you that.” Charlie told him.

“So, you're interested then?”

“More than you know.” Charlie replied.

“Right, consider yourself an employee from tomorrow, I just need to make a call to the FBI and all will be sorted.”

“They won't be happy.”

“Good.” Jack grinned, getting to his feet and holding out a hand to Charlie.

Charlie followed suit, standing up and taking Jack's hand and shaking it firmly. Jack didn't register that Charlie kept his hand in his a little longer than he needed to and Charlie wondered when he had started finding himself attracted to his boss to be.

Jack however didn't miss the look Charlie gave him as he said goodbye to him at the door but he brushed it off as his imagination and headed to his office to check his emails before the others arrived.

Angela arrived first bearing a rather large box of doughnuts, setting them on the counter in the kitchen area before switching on the coffee machine as the other two arrived together.

Walking across the base to meet them Jack spotted the doughnuts straight away and grinned, he missed the delicious Danish pastries that they often indulged in for breakfast in Cardiff but doughnuts made a good substitute Jack decided as he dipped into the box and lifted out the most decadent looking one he could fine and demolished almost half of it in one bite.

“Delicious.” Jack mumbled through his mouthful as Angela passed him a mug of tea.

“Maybe you should go easy on them.” Christopher chuckled and then realised what he had said to his boss. “Sorry.”

Jack's hand went automatically to his stomach, feeling the small swell that hadn't been there when he had left Cardiff and realised he was right. He had eaten a lot more takeaways and comfort food since Ianto had died, he'd have to cut back and try and eat a bit more healthily again.

“Sorry.” Christopher repeated, seeing the look on Jack's face.

“No, you're right.” Jack told him. “Forget it. Okay, from tomorrow Charlie will be joining the team.”

“We need another person?” Dafydd asked. “Not that I have anything against Charlie.”

“I need someone to help with all the day to day running of the place, paperwork, filing and we really need to start an archive of sorts as things are bound to fall through the rift that are of alien origin but not actually aliens.”

“Sounds like a great idea, I hate paperwork.” Angela replied.

“No, we're not going to fob all our paperwork onto Charlie, we do our own but there will be certain things that he will handle himself.”

“And he's okay with the job description?” Dafydd asked.

“Yeah, he's as excited about coming into contact with aliens are you all were.” Jack replied. “We've barely seen any yet, a weevil and a Hoix are nothing compared to what's out there waiting to fall through the rift.”

“You did promise there were some cute aliens out there, now them I'd love to meet.” Christopher told him.

“You've not experienced anything till you've had sex with some species ... not that I have in a very long time I might add!” Jack told him, making them all chuckle.

“You want to tell us about them?” Dafydd asked.

“Maybe one day.” Jack replied. “Okay, it looks like it's going to be another quiet day today, lets make the most of it and finish up on the outstanding paperwork for the Hoix, I'm hoping we get a chance to send it back through the rift soon.”

“I should go and feed it breakfast, along with Tim.” Christopher replied, placing his empty mug in the sink and heading towards the lower level and the holding cells.

“Angela, if you could work more on the rift predictor programme, it's getting there but it needs some tweaking, having a heads up when something's coming through is a real bonus.”

“Consider it done.” Angela told him, she was enjoying expanding her already impressive skills.

“Dafydd with me, lets find an area to designate as the archives.”

“There's an area at the far and of the cells, large empty room we could use.” Dafydd replied as they walked towards the area mentioned. “We could add some shelves, filing cabinets and the like.”

“And it's thinking like that that'll get you my job.” Jack grinned as they entered the room Dafydd had talked about. “Perfect for now.”

“Too small?”

“It might become that way, but for now it'll do.” Jack replied. “Can I leave it to you to arrange for the items we need? We'll have to rely on Charlie to deliver them though, I don't want to have to retcon delivery men if I don't have to.”

“Sure, and I'll call Charlie first for an address to have them delivered to.”

“Thanks, right I need to call the FBI and tell them I'm stealing another member of their organisation.”

“That could be fun.” Dafydd chuckled.

“Oh I hope so.” Jack grinned.

They left the room and made their way back past the cells, both of the residents seemed rather placid as they passed having just been fed and headed back out into the main base.

Dafydd headed to his workstation to find what he needed on-line, pulling out his mobile to call Charlie as Jack went back to his office, not even realising that his hand was resting idly on his stomach as he called the FBI about Charlie.

TBC


	13. Chapter 13

As soon as Jack got back to his flat that evening he dragged the suitcase back out and grabbed the diary, leaving it in the middle of the floor Jack kicked his boots of and lay on the bed and found what the entry he was looking for.

_The Doctor turned up yesterday to refuel the TARDIS, I can't believe I used to be so jealous of him, that he would steal Jack away from me._

_Even in his latest incarnation, he looks so impossibly young for someone in his nine hundreds, although Jack flirts with him it's obvious he had no intentions in that way for Jack._

_I knew the day we married that all my fears were groundless, he was mine and mine alone and I was happy to see him like Jack._

_He was travelling alone but he had had another assistant since he'd lost Donna, Jack told me all about Donna, she seemed like a great woman and I wish I had got to meet her._

_I was desperate to get the Doctor to myself, I wanted to ask him the question that Jack would try and put off for as long as possible._

_Making the excuse about wanting him to have a look at something in the archives I had discovered and had no idea what it was he followed me happy to help, searching around I found something I knew he would know exactly, hell I knew what it was and his face lit up as he explained it to me._

_He wasn't too happy when I brought up the subject of Jack and I having children, oh he was okay at first when he thought we were going to adopt but when I made it a little more obvious what I meant he refused point blank._

_The Doctor puts up an good argument, I'll give him that and I never thought I'd wear him down so I was more than a little amazed when he finally asked what kind of birth control Jack had._

_That amused me, Jack had never referred to it as birth control. I told him that all I knew was it was some kind of chemical inhibitor and he seemed to know exactly what it would be, based on where and when Jack was from._

_Jack gulped. “What have you done?” Jack whispered into the empty room._

_The Doctor vanished and reappeared such a long time later, or so it seemed, I thought he had just left without saying goodbye. He handed me a box, it had one word on the front in some alien language that I couldn't read but the Doctor assured me it would reverse the effects of the inhibitor._

_The whole course lasted a month but he gave me three months supply in case Jack died and reverted back to the beginning, telling me if it didn't work, or if it ran out due to Jack's body resetting too may times then it wasn't meant to be and he wouldn't give us any more._

_I asked him not to mention it to Jack, that I needed to talk to him first so we could decide together that the time was right, something else he wasn't happy about but he agreed in the end when I promised we would contact him if and when Jack did fall pregnant._

_“You didn't please tell me you didn't.” Jack hissed to himself as he moved through the pages of the diary again finally stopping at an entry about six months after their fourth wedding anniversary._

_I started putting the pills in Jack's coffee a couple of days ago, I don't know what compelled me, maybe it was seeing my sister so happy that she was pregnant last week. Okay, I admit it, I was jealous. I should stop, stop and tell Jack, but what if he's angry with me and refuses completely?_

_Shit, what do I do?_

Frowning at the short entry Jack scanned through until he found another about it a couple of days later.

_I haven't stopped, I feel so guilty, how would I feel if Jack got pregnant without asking me first? If I didn't want a baby then bloody angry I should imagine._

_It might not even work, maybe he won't fall pregnant and I won't have to explain myself. I'll tell him, I can't keep deceiving him like this, I feel so bad._

Tears were pouring down Jack's face as he kept reading the following, intermittent entries.

_Three weeks now, three weeks since I started putting the pills in Jack's coffee and I still haven't worked up the nerve to tell him. The longer I leave it the harder it seems to be to admit to what I've done, he's going to be upset with me at the very least and I don't blame him._

_But I also can't bring myself to stop giving him the pills, amazingly he hasn't even died since I started giving him them, how ironic is that?_

“Very.” Jack growled to himself sadly.

Jack got to an entry about three months before Ianto had died, four months ago.

_I might be imaging it but I think Jack might be pregnant, he's having mood swings and, oh I don't know there just seems to be something a little different about him. The strange food cravings for fruit and salad might have something to do with it, but that seems to be going again now._

_Oh hell, what the fuck do I do now, just say to him. 'Hey Jack, here's a pregnancy test, maybe miracles happen'_

_SHIT SHIT SHIT_

_He's going to kill me, we agreed to decide together when to have kids, I am an idiot, a soon to be single idiot._

_FUCK._

“Fuck indeed.” Jack muttered, getting off the bed and flinging the journal into the suitcase.

Jack marched into the bathroom, turned on the shower and stripped. Standing under the cascading water he put his hand on his belly, there was no doubt it was slightly swollen but whether it was caused by Ianto's actions or too may doughnuts he had no idea.

Sliding down the cool ties Jack sat in the bottom of the shower, his hand rubbing in small circles over his belly. He was completely stunned, what the hell was he going to do he asked himself.

Should be keep it? After all it was Ianto's part of his lover, his husband and something he had wished for. But on the other hand it would complicate things so much, if he was already beginning to show he would have to head back to Cardiff sooner rather than later before it became more obvious.

Could be abort Ianto's baby he asked himself as he got to his feet feeling confused and upset, turning the water off Jack grabbed a towel and wrapped it around himself and walked into the living room and curled up on the sofa hugging a cushion to himself as he sobbed uncontrollably.

Jack woke some hours later having cried himself to sleep, his hand reaching down to his stomach before he was even fully awake wondering if it had all been a dream but no, the small bump was still there.

“But I died, when Ianto and Gwen died, if I was pregnant I can't still be can I?” Jack asked the bump, rubbing the palm of his hand over the it. “I can't be ... but what if I am?”

Sitting himself back up Jack opened the laptop on the coffee table and opened Rhiannon's email, his fingers hovering over the reply button again as he decided whether telling her was a good idea, making his decision he pressed it, he needed to talk to someone and she was one of the few people he could tell.

_Rhiannon,_

_I ... oh hell, where do I start._

_Jack began, just typing everything that came into his head._

_Okay, first of all it seems that your brother was a lot more sneaky than I gave him credit for and considering what happened with Lisa, well, that's some kind of achievement._

_If he was still alive I'd kill him ... no actually I'd think about it but I'd get over it and be happy he was still there._

_Oh shit._

_Right, here it is, the thing is, well you know you said you wish we'd given you a niece or nephew? Well I think I might be pregnant._

_I hope you were sitting down when you read that because I was lying down when I read something in Ianto's journal that lead me to believe I could be and I think I would have fallen over if I hadn't been._

_Maybe it's just wishful thinking ..._

_What the hell do I do? If I am that is, I mean I haven't even had it confirmed yet._

_And how the hell do I do that? I can't just go to a doctor and I don't want my new team knowing yet in case it's a false alarm, do you think a normal test will work for me? A woman's pregnancy test that is?_

_I'm so confused. Heh, you might have worked that out yourself by now._

_Maybe I should have an abortion? Surely that would be best all round? I mean, how am I going to keep it a secret, take care of it? If I go back to Cardiff I'm going back to Torchwood Three, UNIT looking after it is only a temporary arrangement and I have no team, fuck, I have no team._

_What the hell do I do Rhi?_

_I miss him so much it hurts, is it really only a month? It feels like so much longer, your brother was everything to me and I feel so lost without him._

_Do you know what's worse? Your cousin Dafydd is one of my team here, he looks nothing like Ianto but he has his eyes, I look into them and see Ianto every day._

_I wish I could just curl up and die, sometimes I wonder if when you die for good do you get to be with your lost ones again? I want to die and stay dead and find out, I'll always hate that he died and I got to live._

_Jack._

Tears were pouring down Jack's face as he sent the send button, as soon as it went he felt guilty for telling her he wish he was dead in the same email as telling her he might be carrying Ianto's baby.

Jack hit the reply button again.

_Rhi, I'm sorry, I should never have said I wish I was dead, please help me._

_Jack._

Jack made his way back to the bathroom and grabbed wads of tissue, wiping his eyes and blowing his nose before splashing his face with cold water.

Looking in the mirror above the sink Jack stared at his face, his eyes were red rimmed and bloodshot.

“Oh hell.” He told himself before reaching for the door of the kitchen cabinet and taking out the packet of sleeping pills he had been prescribed after Ianto's death.

Turning the packet over he read the instructions, confirming that they were safe to take during pregnancy Jack swallowed one, took the towel from his body and hung it up before going to his bedroom and sliding between the covers, leaving the suitcase and book were they were on the floor and closed his eyes.

He had barely been asleep for two hours when the phone rang, Jack fumbled for it in a haze.

“Hello?” He mumbled.

“Jack, it's Dafydd, looks like three weevils are causing havoc in Tyson's Corner Centre.”

“ Can you pick me up?” Jack asked, getting out of bed and feeling as groggy as hell.

“Ten minutes.” Dafydd told him, cutting the call.

Jack showered again for the second time that night to help wake himself up and threw his clothes on just in time as the doorbell rang.

“You look like hell.” Dafydd told him as he opened the door.

“Took a pill to sleep, not quite awake yet. Jack told him as way of an explanation.

“Right, okay we need to go.” Dafydd replied.

Jack followed thinking he was right about Dafydd, he was a natural leader.

TBC


	14. Chapter 14

The SUV screeched into the car park below the shopping mall where it was met by a man wearing a security guards uniform looking like he wanted to be anywhere other than where he was at that moment.

“Captain Jack Harkness.” Jack told him. “Can you tell exactly what's happened?”

“We, my mate and I were doing our final sweep of the mall and this thing just appeared out of nowhere, it looked like someone messing about, wearing a mask.”

Jack nodded as the man continued.

“Then two more followed it out of the bathroom, we yelled at them to stop mucking around and before we could say anything else they attacked him, my mate.” He paused and took a deep breath. “They had these huge teeth, when they started ripping his throat out I just ran and locked them in.”

“Good idea.” Jack told him. “Right, lets go get them.”

The security guard unlocked the door and stood aside, letting them take the risk of being attacked as they walked through the door. He watched as they drew their guns and went inside before closing the door behind them and locking it, there was no way one of those creatures was coming out and after him.

“Bloody hell!” Angela exclaimed at the sight before them.

There was broken glass from smashed shop windows and deep scratches from the weevils sharp claws in the walls on both levels from what they could tell.

“Quiet.” Jack told them, raising a finger to his lips. “Listen.”

They all fell silent, listening to the sounds echoing around the empty mall, trying to work out where the weevils were.

“Right, from the sound of it there is at least one at the far end of the mall, the upper level from the sounds of if and another on this level somewhere over on the right hand side.” Jack told them.

“What about the third?” Christopher asked. “I can only hear two distinct sounds too.”

“It's either with one of the others or it could be anywhere.” Jack replied. Christopher, you and Angela take the top floor, Dafydd and I'll take this one.”

“Got ya.” Christopher replied, heading off towards the motionless escalator.

“Keep your wits about you, that third one could be anywhere.” Jack hissed after them.

“You can count on it.” Angela told him and they began to ascend the steps.

“Lets go.” Jack told Dafydd, moving to the right hand side of the mall and walking quickly but quietly towards the source of the disturbance.

Jack put a finger to his lips and gestured to a shop with a broken window with his head, advancing with caution Jack looked into the shop and spotted the weevil right at the back, ripping apart boxes.

“Weevil one.” Jack told Dafydd in hushed tones and took the syringe of sedative from his pocket. “Don't hesitate to shoot if it attacks.”

“I've got your back.” Dafydd replied as they climbed through the window.

Glass scrunched noisily under Jack's boot and he swore softly under his breath as the weevil dropped the box in it's hand and turned to look at them, growling in warning at them.

Then it ran towards them, Jack fired the fist shot and Dafydd the second both hitting it in the head and it dropped to the floor, hitting it hard.

Jack moved quickly, knowing the bullets wouldn't keep it down for long and injected the sedative into it's neck.

“We'll come back for it later, lets track the other one down.” Jack told Dafydd.

There were three loud shots from above followed by a shout of 'Oh yeah!” From Christopher as they heard the thud of it dropping to the floor.

“Two down, one to go.” Dafydd grinned at Jack.

“Lets go get it.” Jack told him as they climbed back through the broken shop window.

“Any sign of the third?” Jack asked Angela and Christopher over the comms.

“Negative.” Angela replied. “We're searching the rest of this level.”

“Keep me updated.” Jack replied.

“I'll do this side, you that, let me know the instant you find it, no heroics.” He told Dafydd.

Dafydd gave him a look as if to say it was a stupid statement and rolled his eyes causing Jack to gulp down his emotions again, after rubbing his eyes with the back of his hands as the sleeping pill tried to take effect again Jack headed down the opposite side of the mall the Dafydd.

“Jack, you okay?” Dafydd asked over the comm as he watched Jack rub his eyes and he walked.

“Yeah, fine.”

Avoiding the glass as best they could they moved slowly, checking out each shop meticulously before moving onto the next one.

“It's got to be here somewhere!” Angela's voice whispered over the comm.

“Just keep looking and be careful.” Jack whispered back. “Anything Dafydd?”

“Nope.”

“Where the hell ... Fuck ...” Jack span around as he heard the sound of glass being crushed underfoot and found himself face to face with the third weevil.

Dafydd, Angela and Christopher all came to a standstill as they heard a scream of agony down their comms.

“Jack!” Dafydd yelled as he leapt from through the broken window of the shop he had been in and spotted Jack writhing on the floor in pain as the weevil looked up and growled at him.

Dafydd fired a shot as Angela and Christopher ran down the stationary escalator and both fired shots at the creature until he went down as Dafydd ran to Jack's side.

“Jack, Jack talk to me.” Dafydd said as he knelt beside him, the deep scratches on his chest pouring with blood.

“Help me.” Jack gasped.

“Get the medical kit from the SUV.” Dafydd shouted to the other two team members.

Angela turned on her heal and ran for the door, bashing on it hard until the security guard was convinced it wasn't one of the creatures and let her out to get to the SUV, letting her back in minutes later and locking it again unconvinced that there was no threat anymore.

When she got back to the others Christopher had his shirt pressed to Jack's wounds as Dafydd pressed his fingers to the pulse point in Jack's neck as Jack struggled to stay conscious.

“Don't let me die, I can't die, not again.” Jack wheezed.

“You're losing blood fast Jack.” Dafydd told him.

“You''ll come back Jack, like you told us.” Angela told him softly, brushing his hair from his brow.

“I will but ... I can't risk it, not now I know.” Jack rasped, wincing in pain.

“Jack, you're not making any sense.” Dafydd told him. “Know what?”

“About the baby.”

“Baby? What baby?”

“My baby.”

“Jack if you've got someone pregnant you dying won't hurt the baby.” Christopher told him. “It's going to be okay.”

Angela took off her jacket and replaced the one sodden with blood on Jack's chest, Christopher pressing down on it again as she tossed the other to one side.

“No, my baby ...” Jack gasped for breath. “My baby.”

They all watched as Jack slowly lifted his hand and pressed it on his stomach before looking at each other is confusion.

“Jack, are you trying to tell me ... you're ... pregnant?” Dafydd asked a little baffled.

“Might me, don't know, Ianto's.” Jack panted.

“Holy shit!” Angela exclaimed.

“The bleeding has slowed.” Christopher observed as he tried to digest the information and lifted the jacket. “He's healing!”

“Hurts.” Jack told them, closing his eyes.

“Jack, stay with me.” Dafydd told him. “Open your eyes and look at me.”

Jack forced his eyes open and looked in Dafydd's, seeing Ianto's before he remembered where he was.

“The wound is healing Jack, that's a good thing, yes?” Dafydd asked.

“Tired, so tired.”

“That's the blood loss, Jack you're body is healing ... fast, you're going to be okay.”

“The baby?”

“And the baby.” Dafydd reassured him convinced Jack was just babbling nonsense.

“Can't lose the baby.” Jack mumbled.

Dafydd turned to the other two. “Get the security guard to help you move the weevils to the SUV.”

“He's scared stupid.” Angela told him.

“Convince him and then help me get Jack back to the car.”

“We'll drag the two on this floor to the door, then he can help get the other one done from the upper level with me while Angela helps you with Jack.” Christopher replied, grabbing the weevil by the ankles and pulling it's heavy weight slowly across the floor.

Angela moved to help him, grasping one ankle as Christopher moved both hands to the other and continued on with the task in hand.

“Jack, you're okay.” Dafydd told him. “We'll be back to the base before you know it where I can check you over properly.”

“Doesn't hurt so much.” Jack replied, his breathing a little easier.

“Jack, you kept ... babbling about being pregnant?”

“Yeah, about that, something else that I maybe should have told you.”

“Fuck, you mean you weren't just rambling?”

Jack nodded a little weakly.

“Fuck!”

“I'll explain later, just get me back to the base.”

“Can you stand?” Dafydd asked as he saw Angela walking back towards them as Christopher headed upstairs with the security guard.

“I think so.”

Dafydd stood up as Angela reached them and between them they pulled Jack to his feet, Jack wrapped his arms around their shoulders as they helped him walk through the mall to the exit and into the back of the SUV.

“I'll sit with you.” Angela told him, going to the other side and getting in, encouraging Jack to rest his head on her shoulder.

Soon after Christopher reappeared with the security guard, dragging the weevil across the floor of the car park and then lifted it into the back on top of the others.

Pulling a beer from the cool box in the side of the boot of the car Christopher handed it to the guard.

“Here, you earned this.” He told him, watching as the man unscrewed the lid and took three or four long gulps of the retcon laced drink. “Thanks for your help.”

“Cheers.” He replied, holding up the bottle and headed back to the mall wondering just how he was going to explain all the damage.

The mood in the SUV all the way back the the base was a little strange, all three of Jack's team thinking about what he had said about there being a baby as Jack dozed on Angela's shoulder.

TBC


	15. Chapter 15

Dafydd sent Angela and Christopher to deal with the weevils in the boot of the SUV while he took Jack to the medical bay, letting Jack lean against him as he was still a little weak from the blood loss and the effect of the sleeping pills he had taken earlier that were still roaming around his body.

Jack sat quietly on the examination table as Dafydd took his pulse and listened to his heartbeat, announcing them both to be normal before checking the wounds on Jack's body, all of which here almost healed.

“So, you heal fast too, even if you don't die?”

“Yeah, some things faster than others.”

“Does it hurt?”

“A little.”

“I can give you something, if you want?”

“No, it's not bad.”

“Jack, when you were hurt you were saying something a little, well, I think it was just the blood loss talking, gibberish.” Dafydd skirted the subject.

“It wasn't gibberish.” Jack replied, looking Dafydd straight in the eye.

“You can't be pregnant Jack, men don't get pregnant.”

“This man can.”

“Are you saying this thing that gave you immortality also made you able to get pregnant too?”

“No, I was already like that, in the 51st century it's possible for men to bare children.”

“Wow ... It's Ianto's?”

Jack glared at him.

“I'm sorry.” Dafydd replied quickly. “Have you got any idea how far along you are?”

“No, but this small bump must mean I was pregnant well before he ...” Jack trailed off with a barely concealed sob before taking a deep breath and continuing. “And if I was how the hell did the baby survive?”

“What do you mean?”

“When I die, my body resets, goes back to how it was when I died the time I was resurrected. I died when Ianto and Gwen were killed, if I was pregnant the baby should have vanished.”

“Do you want me to confirm whether you are or not, see if' it's just too doughnuts like Christopher joked or if you really do have a baby in there?”

“I'm scared, if I am, what the hell do I do?” Jack admitted.

“That's your decision Jack, but you can't decide anything until you know if you are or not.”

“I guess, okay, do it.”

“Loosen your clothes and lie back.” Dafydd told him collecting together the scanner they had modified and the gel to put on Jack's stomach.

Jack pulled his shirt from his trousers, then unbutton and unzipped them, pushing them low on his hips before lying back.

“I've been pregnant before, a long time ago.”

“What happened, to the baby?”

“It didn't end well.”

“Oh Jack, I'm so sorry.”

“It's okay, it was a long time ago.” Jack replied sadly as Dafydd squirted the gel on Jack's belly and made him jump. “Cold.”

“Do you erm ... have a full bladder?”

“A full bladder?”

“Helps to see baby's better normally.” Dafydd shrugged.

“Well, I haven't pee'd in a while, so ...”

“Right, okay, lets do this.”

Dafydd turned the scanner on and placed it on Jack's stomach, moving it bit by bit over the small bump and let out a gasp of amazement.

“Dafydd?”

“There's ... there's a baby in there!”

Jack burst into tears, sobbing loudly and having no idea if he was crying from happiness, shock at finally knowing he was pregnant or upset.

Dafydd put the scanner down and pulled Jack up into a sitting position, wrapping his arms around him comfortingly and let him cry into his shoulder, Jack's whole body shaking as the sobs went through his body until they began to ease off.

“Jack, it's okay, we'll get you through this.”

“I don't understand, I died, I can't be pregnant.”

“The evidence was clear as day, I can assure you.”

“There must be something wrong with the scanner.”

“It's working perfectly Jack, look, I have no idea of the workings of your body but the baby has your genes along with Ianto's, maybe it has your regeneration properties?”

“It's still not plausible, it should have vanished, there would have been nothing to regenerate.”

“Then I guess the only way to look at it is as a miracle.”

“I don't believe in miracles.”

“Looks like it's time to change your beliefs.”

“What do I do? Should I keep it, get rid of it?”

“Only you can make that call, your body, your baby, but you need to decide soon.”

“Why?”

“I didn't have time to do any measurements but at a guess you're at least sixteen weeks pregnant.”

“Shit.”

“Be honest Jack, if you had no work worries would you have no qualms about keeping this baby?”

“No, it's Ianto's, I'd have it in an instant.”

“Then have it Jack, it's part of him.”

“I don't know if I can, how do I look after a baby with my job?”

“We'll work something out.”

“I need to spend some time alone I think, decide what I want to do.”

“I won't stop you, you should go home and rest after what you've been though tonight as it is.”

“I should help, with the weevils and Charlie will be here in a few hours for his first day.”

“We can cope Jack, I can show Charlie the ropes until you're ready to come back in.”

“Would you take me home?”

“Of course.”

“And if the others ask, just explain for me, okay? I'm not sure I'm up to telling anyone else again just yet.”

“Sure.”

Dafydd dropped Jack off at his apartment with strict instructions to to rest, Jack ran a bath and lay in it until the water turned cold with his hand resting on his belly and his thoughts in turmoil as he tried to decide what to do.

His heart was telling him there was no way he could get rid of the baby, it was made from his and Ianto's love but his head was telling him to be practical, that there was no way he was capable of looking after a baby with his job.

Then his heart chipped in again and told him that he earned a small fortune that he never spent and he was quite capable of hiring a full time nanny, that this baby was Ianto's greatest wish even if he had gone the wrong way about getting it.

Jack got out the bath when he started shivering, wrapping a towel from the heated towel rack around him before pulling out the plug. After rubbing himself dry Jack donned his dressing gown and headed into the living room.

Switching on the TV Jack slumped onto the sofa and lay down along it's length, hoping that watching some mind numbing TV would help, flicking through the channels until he found a comedy they he liked.

Two hours later Jack was still lying there staring blankly at the screen having no idea what was actually happening on it, his mind unable to focus on anything but the baby.

With a sigh Jack sat up and reached for his laptop, turning it on and going straight to his email and finding what he knew would be there, an email from Rhiannon.

Hoping that her reply would talk some sense into him he opened the email and began to read.

Jack,

Are you? Pregnant I mean? You know if you are it's the best thing imaginable, don't you? Ianto would be so happy, I know he wanted a baby with you so badly.

If you are, don't you even contemplate getting rid of it, I will personally come over there and kill you, over and over again until you get the message of how angry I'll be with you.

Come home Jack, back to Cardiff. This baby could help with the rest of my family, I have no idea what we would tell them but I know they would love another grandchild, Ianto's child.

I know exactly what you're thinking, that you can't work and look after a small baby on your own, you won't have to, we'll help, Johnny and I.

Please tell me soon, I'm bursting to know.”

Love,  
Rhiannon.

Jack closed the laptop, he had no idea what he was thinking, he couldn't tell her yet, until he had decided what he was going to do. Heading to the bedroom with a long yawn Jack slid between the sheets of his bed and closed his eyes, hoping sleep would come after being interrupted in the night.

It was some hours later when Jack woke, he glanced confused at the clock on the bedside table which told him it was three o'clock. But the sun was shining brightly outside so it couldn't be night time, it took Jack a few minutes to get his bearings as his hand moved to his belly and rested on the new life within.

A knock on the door startled Jack, getting out of bed and putting his dressing gown on Jack guessed it was Dafydd coming to check up on him, opening the door he was a little surprised to find Charlie stood there with a worried look on his face.

“Charlie?” Jack asked. “Something wrong, am I needed?”

“Nothings wrong, nothing that requires your presence at Torchwood anyway.”

“Did you're first day go okay, I'm sorry I wasn't there.” Jack told him as he let him into the apartment.

“Dafydd was great, showed me everything I needed to know, he's going to make a great leader, just like you thought.”

“Sooner that I thought, maybe.” Jack replied.

“He said you were sick?”

“Dafydd didn't tell you what was wrong?”

“No, although the others seemed to know.”

“They probably thought it was my secret to tell, not that it'll be a secret for much longer if I decide to keep it.” Jack told him.

“Keep what?”

“You might want to sit down for this.” Jack told him, walking to the sofa. “There's no way of saying this except for coming straight out with it.”

“Go on then.” Charlie told him as he sat beside him on the sofa.

“I'm pregnant.”

Charlie looked stunned and then burst out laughing.

“You're kidding right, good one.”

“No, I'm perfectly serious.”

“But ... how? Is it an alien?”

“No, it's a baby, mine and Ianto's.”

Charlie looked at him as if he was mad and then confused and a little shocked as Jack explained how a man could get pregnant and carry a baby.

“You're really pregnant?” Charlie asked a aghast.

“Yeah.”

“You're keeping it?”

“I don't know, I want to but ...” Jack shrugged.

“If you want it, keep it.”

“It's not that simple.” Jack replied, tears escaping his eyes again and running down his cheeks.

“It is Jack, it really is. You're still planning on going back to Cardiff?”

“Yeah, whatever I decide.” Jack told him, brushing away the tears with the back of his hand.

“Shame.” Charlie smiled.

“Dafydd a good guy, working for him won't be so bad.”

“It wasn't work I was thinking about.”

“I don't understand?” Jack replied, now the one who was confused.

Charlie lent forwards and pressed his lips to Jack, brushing against them briefly and almost chastely before pulling away and looking into Jack's eyes.

“Sorry, I shouldn't have done that.” He told him, seeing the confusion in them.

“I don't know what to say.”

“It's okay.” Jack assured him.

“I should go, let you rest.” Charlie said, getting to his feet and walking to the door.

Jack followed him, catching him up.

“I'll see you tomorrow, at work?” Charlie asked.

“Bright and early.”

“Bye.” Charlie told him, reaching for the door handle.

Before he could open it Jack's body pressed him to the door, Jack's arms winding around him tightly as his mouth found his. The kiss was fuelled by loneliness and the need to feel close to someone as Jack plundered Charlie's mouth with his tongue, lips clashing hard enough to bruise as he guided him back towards the sofa.

TBC


	16. Chapter 16

The back of Charlie's knees hit the edge of the sofa and he tumbled backwards on to it taking Jack with him, Jack's lips never leaving his.

Charlie's arms wrapped tightly around Jack holding him close, feeling his whole body pressing into his, his arousal throbbing between his legs but he became aware that Jack's was non existent.

As passionately as he was kissing him Jack's body was not responding, Charlie knew when he kissed him before it was a mistake as soon as he did it but when Jack kissed him back he found himself unable to resist but he knew he couldn't let this carry on as much as he wanted to.

Gathering all his inner strength Charlie broke the kiss and pushed Jack carefully away, moving so they were both in a sitting position as he felt guilty when he saw the sadness and confusion in Jack's eyes.

“You're not ready for this Jack, it's too soon.”

“I'm sorry.” Jack replied, clearly upset and getting to his feet.

Charlie jumped up and stopped him as he went to head for the bathroom.

“Nothing to be sorry for, I kissed you first, it's my fault.” Charlie told him as he watched Jack's eyes fill with tears.

“I'm so lonely, it feel like forever since someone held me, kissed me, made love to me ... since I lost him.”

“And I understand, I do, but you're not ready to sleep with anyone yet, it's only month or so Jack and your hormones must be all over the place, even your body's not reacting to the kiss.”

The floodgates opened and Charlie pulled Jack into a hug as he began to sob, holding him close as he let him cry into his shoulder.

“I like you Charlie, I really do, but ...” Jack mumbled between sobs.

“You're still in love with Ianto, it's normal Jack, it's okay.”

“I really want this baby, it's part of Ianto, the only part I have but I'm so scared.”

“Scared? Of being pregnant? Giving birth? Being a single parent? Juggling a baby with work? I'm sure every woman has the same fears, they all manage to cope somehow.”

Jack lifted his head from Charlie's shoulder and hiccuped as his sobs subsided a little, Charlie reached into his pocket and pulled out a handkerchief and wiped away Jack's tears as he spoke.

“All those things and more, I'm a man, if anyone found out ...”

“You've kept all your other secrets Jack, what's one more? Stay here, let Dafydd look after you?”

Jack shook his head. “No, if I have this baby I'm going back to Cardiff, it where we belong.”

“Is there someone there that can help, a doctor you can trust?

“Martha Jones.” Jack replied instantly, smiling weakly at her name.

“A relative of Ianto's?”

“No, none at all, just someone I'd trust to the end of the universe.”

“Have you contacted her?”

“Not yet, I didn't want to unless I had to.”

“I think you should, she could help you to decide.”

“I emailed Ianto's sister, she adamant that I should keep it.”

“She knows!”

“Ianto told her, all about me, I would have been mad at him if I'd known before, but now I'm relieved she knows.”

“She's right, you should keep it, from the way you're reacting I think if you abort this baby you'll regret it for the rest of your life, and that's a long time for regret.”

Jack nodded slowly but didn't answer.

“How pregnant are you, it might be too late already to even consider abortion.”

“Dafydd thinks at least sixteen weeks.”

“You haven't felt it kick yet?”

“No, but I think I can feel it moving a little, strange little fluttering feelings inside me, but I might be imagining it.”

Charlie took Jack's hand in his and placed it on his belly.

“Keep it Jack, Ianto wanted this baby so much, do this for him.”

Jack nodded again, this time very slowly as he thought about Charlie's words.

“Yeah, so much that he couldn't tell me how much.”

“You're going to keep it?”

“I am.” Jack replied, a tear rolling down his face but a smile on his lips.

“Congratulations Jack, you're going to be a daddy.”

“Oh my god!” Jack exclaimed, feeling a little weak at the strangely sudden realisation.

Charlie led him back to the sofa and sat down with him.

“I need to email Martha, tell Rhiannon and make plans to go home before it becomes too obvious.”

“Slow down Jack, first you need to see Dafydd and get a proper scan, find out how pregnant you are, make sure the baby's healthy.”

“Can you take me to the base?”

“Of course I can, you might want to get dressed while I call Dafydd though.” Charlie suggested.

Jack glanced down as he realised he was still only wearing his dressing gown and headed for the bedroom as Charlie pulled out his mobile phone and called Dafydd.

By the time Jack came back fully dressed Charlie had arranged with Dafydd to meet them at the base, grabbing his wallet and keys Jack led the way to the door of the apartment, pausing before he opened it and turned to Charlie.

“Thank you, for everything.” Jack told him. “If this was another time, under different circumstances nothing would have stopped what we were about to do earlier.”

“And I wouldn't have stopped you, now lets forget about it and get you to the base, I'm as anxious to see this baby as you are.” Charlie told him.

Jack lent forwards and kissed Charlie briefly on the cheek before opening the front door and letting them out, locking it behind them they headed down to Charlie's car.

As Charlie drove them to the base Jack felt like a cloud was lifting, he knew for certain that he was keeping the baby, it was Ianto's baby and he would anything in the world for it for that very reason.

Soon after Jack found himself in much the same position as before, lying on the examination bed with his shirt pulled up his chest and his trousers low on his hips as Dafydd squeezed the gel on his stomach, Jack bracing himself for the coldness.

Dafydd turned the scanner on and placed it on Jack's belly noticing that Jack had reached for Charlie's hand and was holding it tight but let it go, smiling to himself as a picture of the baby appeared on the screen he turned up the volume and the sound of the baby's heartbeat filled the room.

“Fuck me!” Charlie exclaimed, staring at the screen as the steady beat filled his ears. “Bloody hell.”

Dafydd chuckled. “Sure is a bit of a shock.” He agreed.

“Is it okay?” Jack asked.

“Just give me a few minutes to take some measurements.” Dafydd replied, tapping at the keys of the computer's keyboard.

“That's amazing.” Charlie said to Jack, eyes still fixed to the screen.

“A miracle.” Jack grinned.

“How, I mean, where does it come out?” Charlie stuttered looking a tad worried.

“C-section, don't panic.” Jack told him.

“I was worried there for a minute, I mean, I know it can stretch, but ...”

Both Jack and Charlie burst out laughing as Dafydd turned to them.

“Okay, judging by the measurements you're approximately eighteen or nineteen weeks pregnant.” Dafydd told Jack.

“And it's healthy?”

“Perfectly from what I can tell, I'll take some blood and do all the usual tests in pregnancy.” Dafydd replied as he reached for the blood pressure cuff and wrapped it around his arm.

“I forgot about everything that goes along with pregnancy.” Jack said as Dafydd took his blood pressure.

“You've been pregnant before?” Charlie asked.

“Yeah.” Jack replied, his tone indicating that he didn't want to talk about it.

“Blood pressure is a little elevated but with the events of the last few days I'm not surprised, nothing to worry about but we'll keep an eye on it.” Dafydd told Jack as he reached for a syringe to take blood.

“Are you sure?” Jack asked worriedly.

“Yes, now relax.”

“Easier said that done.” Jack winced as the needle pierced his skin.

“There all done.” Dafydd told Jack as he pressed a ball of cotton wool to the site where he had just extracted the blood.

“When will you have the results of the blood tests?” Charlie asked.

“A few hours.” Dafydd grinned as Charlie avoided his eye.

“I don't think I can wait that long.” Jack told him.

“Go and eat, I bet you haven't eaten anything in hours?”

“No.” Jack admitted, suddenly feeling starving. “At least I missed the morning sickness.”

“Do you want to know what it is?” Dafydd asked as Jack slid off the bed and fastened his trousers.

“You know?” Jack replied.

“Yes.” Dafydd grinned.

Jack nodded excitedly without hesitation. “Yeah!

“It's a girl.”

“Ianto wanted a little girl.” Jack replied, turning sad again as he thought about the man he had lost. “He even knew what he wanted to call her.”

“Are you going to tell us?” Dafydd asked.

“Saffir, it means Sapphire, he thought with both of us having blue eyes it would be perfect.”

“It is.” Dafydd told him. “Now, go and eat, Charlie make sure he does, he's eating for two now and Jack.”

“What?”

“Keep the doughnuts to a minimum.”

“You are more like Ianto than you will ever know.” Jack told him.

“I shall take that as a compliment.” Dafydd grinned. “Now scat.”

Charlie led him to a decent restaurant not too far from the base, getting them a table almost instantly after a word with the hostess and they were lead to their table.

TBC


	17. Chapter 17

When Jack's mobile beeped with a message telling him that Dafydd had the results of the blood tests and asking him to return to the base he and Charlie was still in the restaurant, drinking their fifth or six cup of tea although Jack wasn't too happy when Charlie insisted he should have decaf but he went along with it.

Paying the bill they headed straight back to the base, Jack had been panicking all the time at the restaurant that he had done something to harm the baby, not only had he been drinking a lot of tea since he's arrived in DC he had uncharacteristically drunk a fair share of alcohol when he had lost Ianto too.

“Dafydd, Dafydd.” Jack shouted as soon as they entered the base.

“I'm in the kitchen Jack.” Came his reply.

Jack practically ran through to the kitchen with Charlie behind him to find Dafydd calmly sitting in one of the comfy chairs calmly drinking coffee.

“What's wrong?” Jack asked, positive there was.

“Sit.” Dafydd told him. “Now!”

A little stunned Jack just did as he was told and sat the the chair opposite him, Charlie taking the seat beside Jack.

“Well, tell me the bad news.” Jack told him.

“There is no bad news Jack, the baby is completely healthy, you will be having a bouncing baby daughter.” Dafydd grinned.

“Saffir.” Jack smiled. “I need to make plans to go back to Cardiff.”

“So soon?” Charlie asked.

“I'm already beginning to show and it'll be hard to hide soon and also I can't risk going into labour on the flight.” Jack replied. “I can't have this baby here, I need to be home.”

“I'll be in the medical bay if you need me.” Dafydd told Jack as he got to his feet and left the room.

“I wish you weren't going so soon, I'll miss you.” Charlie told Jack quietly.

“Charlie ... I do find you attractive but as you said earlier, it's far too early for me to even consider getting involved with anyone, I'm still grieving for Ianto and this pregnancy, although wonderful I think having this baby will just make me miss him even more, I'm sorry.” Jack told him gently.

“I understand completely Jack, I do, I just wish you were staying here, so we could at least get to know each other better, even just as friends for now.” Charlie replied.

“Coming here was only ever temporary, it's just going to be shorter than I originally intended.” Jack replied. “I miss Cardiff as much almost as much as I miss Ianto, it's my home and that's where I want this, Ianto's baby to be born.”

“Then all I can do is congratulate you on your pregnancy and hope everything goes as you want.” Charlie replied honestly. “Make sure your friends take very good care of your or they'll have me to answer too.”

“They will, I promise.” Jack told him, standing up and reaching a hand out to Charlie and pulling him to his feet when he took it. “ I think I'm going to miss you.”

“We'll all miss you Jack.” Charlie grinned.

“I'm going to head back to the apartment and email Rhiannon and Martha, arrange for where I'm going to stay, I can't stay at the hub on my own in this condition and then I can decide when I'm going home and book the fight.” Jack replied.

“Let me give you a lift, I drove you here.” Charlie offered.

“That would be great, thank you.” Jack told him as they left the kitchen area, only stopping to tell Dafydd where they were going and that he should go home too as it was now so late in the evening.

Neither Jack or Charlie said much on the drive back to Jack's apartment block, they soon pulled up outside and Charlie cut the engine.

“I'm not going yet, I'll be around for the next few days at least.” Jack told Charlie, breaking the silence.

“I'll see you in the morning then.” Charlie replied starting the engine again as Jack opened the door.

Jack hesitated for a second. “Thank you, for everything.”

“You're welcome.” Charlie shrugged, not expecting it as Jack lent over and placed a small soft kiss to his lips.

Jack gave Charlie a weak smile. “See you tomorrow.” Jack told him before climbing out the car and closing the door.

As soon as Jack let himself in to his apartment he sat on the sofa and opened his laptop, going straight to his email and clicking on the last one he'd received from Rhiannon and hit reply.

_Hello auntie Rhi,_

_Yes, as you can see I am pregnant, oh my god, I still can't believe it myself. I've given up trying to work out how, I should have lost it when I died ... when Ianto died, but it's there, in my belly as large as life and I'm keeping it!_

_I'm coming home, back to Cardiff. It's where I belong and where I want Saffir to grow up, I just need a little help finding somewhere to live._

_I can't stay in the hub on my own in this condition, anything could happen, do you know of anywhere near you where I could rent or even buy?_

_Hopefully UNIT will agree to keep running Torchwood Three until I have the baby, obviously I can't tell them exactly why I won't be returning straight away._

_I'm going to make up something along the lines of needing the time to find a new team, that I can't do it alone, hopefully they'll buy it._

_It's a girl if you hadn't already guess, Ianto chose the name a long time ago so she will be called Saffir and I'm approximately eighteen or nineteen weeks pregnant so I'll be home soon._

_Oh Rhi, I was so scared but now I'm more excited than you could ever imagine, I hope you meant it about helping me out because it's a long time since I held a baby let alone looked after one?_

_Hoping to hear from you soon,_   
_Love,_   
_Jack._

Jack grinned widely as he hit the send button and immediately started an email to Martha.

_Martha!_

_I hope you're sitting down? If not then you better before you read the rest of this email!!_

_Sitting?_

_Okay, here goes ... I'm pregnant!_

_Yes, you read that right, I'm not kidding you, I am pregnant with Ianto's baby and I'm so happy you might even say I'm ecstatic!_

_I imagine at this moment in time you are feeling a little gob smacked and maybe even swearing a little, wondering if I'm telling you the truth?_

_I am, I promise, I can even get Dafydd, the doctor on my team here in DC to email you scan pictures if you want?_

_Look, here's the deal, I want this baby born in Cardiff, it's where it belongs and where I belong and well, I'm a man! Yeah, yeah, I know ... I'll need your help, no one else can know, not UNIT, anyone._

_Will you help me?_

_Please say yes, there's no one else I can ask Martha._

_Oh and one other thing, promise me you won't tell him? The Doctor? I don't want him to know until this little girl in is my arms._

_A few details, umm, yes, it's a girl and I'm around eighteen or nineteen weeks pregnant so I'll be flying home soon, a man in labour on a plane would cause a bit of a fuss I think!_

_Dafydd has done all the blood tests and the baby is perfect, well it would be with Ianto's and my gene's wouldn't it?_

_He says my blood pressure is a little up but nothing to worry about, probably just caused by the stress of the last few days._

_Well, finding out your pregnant because you have a sneaky husband and then nearly dying and worrying you'll lose a baby will do that to a person, no more risks for me I can tell you!_

_Ianto's sister knows, Ianto had told her everything about me it seems and she's offered to help me with the baby, I just need you to get me and Saffir though the rest of this pregnancy._

_Hoping to hear back from you really soon,_   
_Love,_   
_Jack._

Jack pressed send and smiled to himself as he shut the laptop and headed to bed, for the first time since he had lost his friend, lover and husband Jack felt happy about something.

Sliding naked into bed Jack lay on his back and pushed the duvet down so it was just below his blossoming bump and placed a hand on it, slowly stroking it back and forth as he imagined the new life inside and spoke softly to his daughter, telling her how much she was wanted and loved and chuckled with delight when he was rewarded with her first kick.

Pulling the duvet back up with his free hand Jack closed his eyes and left his hand resting on his belly as he slowly drifted into sleep imaging his little girl in his mind with a smile on his face.

TBC


	18. Chapter 18

The first email Jack had gotten from Martha arrived a week before, within an hour of the one had had sent to her, but he hadn't got the read it until the following morning. By the time he'd woken, showered and sat down with his laptop he had over a dozen emails from her, most of them were just her begging him to respond.

As Jack reread the email with his hand on his belly, for what seemed like the millionth time he couldn't help but smile to himself.

_Jack!_

_First of all it's so good to hear from you, I can only apologise again for not being able to make the funeral. I want so much to be there for you but as much as I pleaded UNIT wouldn't release me from my duties, I wish now I had just gone AWOL and damn the consequences._

_At first I thought you were kidding me, I mean, I know you're ... special but a pregnant man? But somehow, once it had sunk in I had an inkling it was true and called Ianto's sister to confirm she knew, that was an odd conversation!_

_She's so excited Jack, she thought she would never be an aunt to Ianto's child now he was gone. You've probably read her email by now, she's going to insist that you stay with her and Johnny until the baby is born and then for as long as you need._

_I can't believe you're pregnant!! I'm so happy for you Jack, have no fear, I won't be telling anyone at UNIT or him about the baby as it's none of their business and I don't care what they say I will be taking some leave to care for you during the rest of your pregnancy._

_You're right in thinking that you shouldn't leave it too long to fly, I want you to come home as soon as possible, I'll even meet you at the airport and drive your to Rhiannon's house. Do you still have the TARDIS key with the perception filter?_

_If you don't I still have mine, I think you'll be able to use it to leave the house without people realising there is a pregnant man among them although soon you'll probably want to rest. I'll be keeping an eye on that blood pressure mister!_

_Saffir is a beautiful name Jack, Rhiannon told me that Ianto chose it a long time ago and what it means, I'm sure it'll be perfect and with your and Ianto's gene's she going to be one gorgeous little girl, there is no doubt about it._

_Make your plans Jack, book the flight and let me know when you're coming home, I can't wait to see you, it's been far too long._

_Pregnant!_

_I can't wait to see you with a baby belly ..._

_Lots of love,_   
_Martha._

Jack shut his laptop, unplugged the power lead and packed it into it's carry bag, placing it beside his suitcase as he waited for his lift the the airport. He had said his goodbye's to the rest of Torchwood Five's team the day before, something that became a lot more emotional than he had been prepared for but he knew with Dafydd leading them they were in good hands.

Moving around the apartment Jack checked each room, making sure he hadn't left anything behind and double checked the contents of his hand luggage, making sure it contained the tickets for his flight, passport, his mobile phone and Ianto's diary, which he was going to read from cover to cover on the flight home.

When the doorbell rang Jack reached for his coat, happy in the knowledge that when he arrived back in Cardiff he would be able to wear it again, the weather in DC had been far too hot since he had arrived for it and he felt like he wasn't properly attired whenever he'd gone out.

Jack opened the door and smiled when he saw Charlie standing there.

“You're carriage awaits Sir.” Charlie told him, giving a mock salute before they both chuckled softly.

“I appreciate this Charlie, I could have got a cab ...”

“No, I brought you here and I shall take you back.” Charlie told him. “Where's your case?”

“I can manage.” Jack tried to insist.

“Not on your condition!” Charlie told him as he brushed part and located the case behind the door.

“I'm pregnant, not sick!” Jack huffed.

“All the more reason to not be carrying a heavy suitcase.” Charlie admonished him, lifting it up. “Ready to go?”

“Yeah.” Jack replied, grabbing both his hand luggage and laptop bags, following Charlie from the apartment and closing the door firmly with a small sigh.

“What's with the sigh?” Charlie asked as they got into the lift.

“I think I'm going to miss this place, but I miss Cardiff more.” Jack told him.

“You will keep in touch though, won't you?” Charlie asked, not quite meeting Jack's eyes as the lift doors opened again to let them out.

“Oh yeah, I'll be keeping tabs on all of you.” Jack replied, reaching out and briefly touching the fingers of Charlie's hand with his own before withdrawing them again.

“Good, and we want pictures, as soon as the baby is born.” Charlie told him.

“You try and stop me, you'll all be sick of pictures of us by the time she a week old.” Jack grinned.

During the short drive to the airport Jack let Charlie just talk, finding himself a little emotional now he was actually leaving, just nodding and replying with barely one word when required, the baby seemingly picking up on his emotions and kicking frantically as they pulled into the car park.

Jack got out the car quickly, grabbing his bags from the back seat before Charlie had to chance to notice just how he was feeling and told him he was fine to go on into the airport on his own, that Charlie didn't have to see him off.

“Jack .... I ...” Charlie found himself suddenly lost for words as he tried to tell him how he felt. “I ... wait.”

Jack slowed and then stopped before turning around slowly, seeing the sadness in Charlie's eyes and let him catch him up.

“I'm going to miss you too Charlie.” Jack told him softly. “I wish we had met maybe a few years from now ...”

“It's okay Jack.” Charlie replied, reaching out and stroking his fingertips down Jack's cheek.

Jack dropped the bags on the floor, not caring or even thinking that he might break something and grabbed Charlie by the tie, pulling him close he kissed him desperately. Charlie responded immediately, his mouth opening to let Jack's probing tongue into his mouth, kissing him back with the same desperation until they pulled apart panting.

“Goodbye Charlie.” Jack told him, picking up his bags and walking away without waiting for an answer, a tear rolling down his cheek as thoughts of Ianto filled his mind.

Jack checked himself in and walked through the to gate, putting his coat on and feeling comforted by its weight and feel as he waited for his flight, by the time he boarded the plane Jack was yawning, feeling so tired was something he wasn't at all used to.

Placing his property in an over head locker Jack buckled himself into his seat, as soon as the plane was in the air Jack relined his business class seat into a bed, covered himself with the blanket provided and fell asleep, not waking until hours later and he was almost home.

Getting to his feet Jack stretched and headed for the toilet, splashing his face with cold water to freshen up and then headed back to his seat, a smile on his face at the sight of rain hitting the windows of the plane.

“We're home baby.” Jack whispered as he stroked his belly. “Back where we belong.”

“Are you feeling okay sir? We'll be landing soon.” A female voice asked him.

Jack smiled up at the flight attendant. “Better than I've been in a long time, thank you.”

“If you're sure sir.” She replied and Jack realised his was still rubbing his belly with the palm of his hand.

“I'm fine.” Jack insisted and she nodded and left him alone again.

As the plane descended Jack felt more and more excited about why he was going back to Cardiff, in another twenty weeks or so he would be holding his and Ianto's child in his arms, a miracle.

An hour after leaving the plane and getting through the airport, passport control, collecting his luggage and customs Jack finally got through the airport, hearing a loud squeal of excitement to his left he knew instantly it was Martha.

Turning Jack could see her waving frantically at him, running towards him and wrapping her arms around him in a tight hug as she kissed his cheek.

“You're home!” Martha almost screamed in his ear.

“You have no idea how good it is to be back.” Jack told her as they headed to her car.

“What did you tell the queen, as to why you were leaving so soon?” Martha asked, lifting Jack's suitcase into the boot of her car.

“Personal reasons, she didn't even question it, I think even she realised I shouldn't have taken the job so soon after ... after Ianto ...” Jack gulped back a sob.

“I'm so sorry Jack, I know how much you loved him.” Martha consoled him, hugging him again.

“But at least I still have a part of him.” Jack replied, pressing Martha's hand to his belly as Saffir began to kick again.

“I can't wait to see her on a scan, I know Dafydd sent me the pictures he had take but it's not the same, this is just amazing!” Martha exclaimed excitedly.

“Dafydd is Ianto's cousin.” Jack told her quietly. “I never knew that until I met him, he has his eyes.”

“That must have been so hard, seeing someone who reminded you of him every day.” Martha replied.

“A first, then it became somehow comforting.” Jack smiled softly.

“And who's this Charlie, you mentioned him a lot in your emails?” Martha asked, raising an eyebrow questionably.

“Just a friend, a good friend.” Jack replied.

“You sure about that?”

Jack nodded. “Positive, it's far too soon for anything else.”

“You're going to keep in touch with him.”

“Yeah.” Jack replied before changing the subject. “Come on, I thought you were taking me to Rhi's house, she'll be busting a gut wondering where we've got to.”

“Sure Jack.” Martha replied as they climbed into the car and headed out into the traffic towards Rhiannon's house.

TBC


	19. Chapter 19

Jack lay on his bed stroking his hand over his belly, he still couldn't understand how he was pregnant with Ianto's child and Martha hadn't been able to come up with any explanation either. He'd been staying to Rhiannon and Johnny's house for two weeks now which meant he was about twenty two weeks pregnant, confirmed by the scans Martha had insisting on doing.

Rhiannon had finally told Johnny about Jack, if they were to have a pregnant man living with them as a guest for the next few months then he deserved to know the complete truth before Jack arrived. At first he had thought she was just winding him up but he soon realised that she was being serious and when Jack arrived and he saw the small bump for himself he was just so amazed it was all he could talk about to Jack.

Jack soon realised that Johnny was one of the good guys and felt like he could trust him with his life, partly due to the fact that he believed if Johnny told anyone about Jack and his current condition that Rhiannon would have his guts for garters and his balls on a plate!

With both Johnny and Rhiannon working full time Jack found himself alone for most of the day from Monday to Friday, at first he used the time to lounge about and watch daytime TV but after a few days he began to feel like his brain would turn to mush if he watched much more and he was seriously bored.

It was a Friday when Jack ventured out the house that day, two weeks after he arrived. Grateful for the Welsh weather he slipped on his coat knowing it was still capable of hiding his blossoming baby bump and set out for a walk in the rain.

He had no intention of heading where he did, in fact if he had thought about it he would have walked in completely the opposite direction but somehow he found himself staring at the front door of the flat he and Ianto had shared for over five years.

His head was telling him that going inside was a very bad idea but his heart was telling him he needed to at some point and today was as good as day was any. He was planning to put it on the market when he returned, knowing he couldn't live there anymore if it was without Ianto but he was still reluctant to get rid of the place where he and Ianto had been so happy.

Taking a long, slow deep breath Jack walked up the few steps to the main front door and entered, walking up the stairs as opposed to the lift just because it took longer and stopped in front of their flat. For a second or two he pondered on his decision again, telling himself he hadn't brought a key with him so it was pointless, but that little nagging voice in his head reminded him that the neighbour held a spare key for them.

Jack moved the few feet to the neighbouring front door and knocked, half hoping it would go unanswered, that the occupant would be out but less than a minute later the door opened and the elderly lady who resisted there smiled sympathetically at him.

“Are you okay love? I heard what happened, about the accident. I'm so sorry, he was a lovely young man.” She said to Jack.

“He was, thank you. I was wondering, do you still have out spare key?” Jack asked

“Of course love, I'll get it for you, would you like to come in for a cup of tea?” She asked.

“Thank you, but no, there's something I need to do.” Jack replied politely.

“Of course, wait here a moment.” She told him, vanishing from sight.

She returned with it quickly and handed it to Jack, he thanked her again and told her he would take her up on her offer of a cup of tea maybe next time and then bid her goodbye. Moving back to his own front door Jack hesitated for a minute, holding the key in the lock before turning it slowly and entering, closing the door softly behind him and then leaning against it.

He hadn't been to the flat since Ianto had died, he'd been living at the hub until he went to DC not wanting to venture there. The living room was neat and tidy, the way Ianto had left it on that fateful day, their framed photographs on the mantle piece from their wedding dominated the otherwise unadorned room.

 

Jack moved over to them and picked up the one of them cutting the cake at the reception, they both had their hands on the handle of the knife and were laughing as they posed for the photo. Hugging the framed picture to his chest Jack headed to the kitchen, Ianto's pride and joy, his state of the art coffee machine dominated the work surface.

Reaching out Jack ran his fingertips over the smooth stainless steel lines of the machine, knowing it would leave smudged fingerprints that had Ianto been there he would have been admonished for, the thought forcing a sob from his throat as he turned and fled the kitchen.

Jack found himself in the bathroom, Ianto's shaving things stood on the little shelf about the sink along with his aftershave. Picking up the almost still full bottle Jack unscrewed the cap and raised the bottle to his nose, breathing in the scent he was so used to smelling on his lover but he put it down again quickly knowing there was something missing, the unique smell of Ianto that was normally mingled with it.

It took all Jack's inner strength to move into the bedroom, the duvet on the bed had been straightened and the pillows plumped up as if the bed had never been slept in. Jack's eyes fell on Ianto's dressing gown that was hanging on the back off the bedroom door.

Putting the picture down on the bedside table Jack reached up and unhooked the dressing gown from the door, burying his face in it as he breathed in what he had been searching for, the undeniable scent of his lost love.

Jack sat on the edge of the bed and put the dressing gown on his lap, reaching down he unlaced his boots and pulled them off. Pulling back the duvet Jack crawled into the bed, taking the dressing gown with him, holding it tight to his body as the overwhelming scent of Ianto and sex that had been trapped in the bed invaded his senses.

That was the point Jack fell apart, pulling Ianto's pillow into his arms with the dressing gown he sobbed, body wrenching sobs that made his whole body shake. He had no idea how long he had lay there crying, howling even but he didn't care.

He was lying gazing at the ceiling when there was a knock on the front door, so soft he barely heard it. Jack ignored it telling himself whoever it was was probably just trying to sell him something and would go away but there was a harder knock maybe thirty seconds later.

Jack wiped the back of his hands across his eyes, attempting to dry the tears on his face but failing miserably and made his way to the front door knowing he looked awful. When he opened the door he almost burst out crying again, the elderly lady from next door was standing there with a try in her hands.

On the tray was a large mug of tea, a pile of sandwiches and a selection of home made cakes.

“You're not okay, are you love?” She said to him, pressing the tray into his hands. “I thought you might be hungry, after ... well, take these love.”

“You shouldn't have ...” Jack began.

“I lost my Albert some twenty years ago now, you'll never forget him but it will get easier I promise.” She said, cutting him off. “Never refuse help of any sort, take everything you're offered or you'll regret it.”

“Would you like to come in?” Jack asked, pushing the door open wider with his back.

“No love, you need time alone with your memories, I can see that.” She replied. “Now you just drop the key back through my letterbox when you go and I'll collect these things later. I guess you're living somewhere else for the time being?”

“Yeah, with my sister in law, until I decide what I want to do.” Jack replied.

“Think about it carefully, I almost moved from here when my Albert died but I'm glad I didn't, this place holds all our happy memories.” She told him firmly. “Now, when I collect that tray I want to see that you've eaten everything, you hear me young man?”

Jack couldn't help but give a chuckle at the way she called him 'young man', if only she knew Jack thought to himself.

“I promise to eat it all.” Jack told her. “Thank you.”

The elderly neighbour waved off his thanks and went back to her own flat with a smile as Jack watched, not going back into his own with the tray until she was safely home. Jack put the tray on the coffee table and took a sip of what he discovered was a very good cup of tea and then took a bite out of one of the sandwiches.

As Jack chewed he found he was starving, he demolished all the sandwiches ravenously and then started on the cake, washing it down with the tea and then lent back on the sofa feeling completely full as Saffir kicked him hard.

Jack rubbed his hand over his belling, feeling her little foot kicking. He didn't know if she was complaining that he had eaten so much or the opposite but he loved when she did it, knowing that his and Ianto's little girl was going strong inside his belly.

Feeling his mobile phone vibrate in his pocket as it received a text message Jack pulled it out and couldn't help but smile when he saw it was Charlie. Flipping it open Jack opened the message and read.

Jack, just a message to say hi and ask of you're okay? I know it's only a day since my last message but ... well, I worry about you and the sprog. I sent you an email earlier, it's rather long and I think I rambled quite a lot but it's sent now, feel free to ignore! Missing you, Charlie.

Jack wished Charlie was in Cardiff with him but it wouldn't be fair on either of them, he couldn't give Charlie what he wanted and he was still grieving for Ianto, for now they would just have to keep in touch via texts and emails and see what happened. If it all fizzled out then it wasn't meant to be, if it turned into something more ... well then he'd deal with that when the time came.

Washing up the plates and mug Jack put them back on the tray and left it on the coffee table, venturing back into the bedroom Jack collected Ianto's dressing gown and left the flat, dropping the key through his neighbours letterbox as instructed and made his way back to his in laws house.

Rhiannon was home when he arrived, she took one look at his still red rimmed eyes and pulled him into her arms, hugging him tightly.

“I'm okay, honestly.” Jack assured her as she loosened her grip. “I went to the flat and I got a little overwhelmed.”

“What have you got there?” Rhiannon asked, pointing at the dressing gown draped over Jack's arm.

“It's Ianto's, I just needed something of his.” Jack explained. “You won't wash it, will you?”

“No sweetheart, of course not.” Rhiannon replied, her own eyes filling with tears.

“I don't think I'm going to sell the flat, as a wise woman said to me today it holds all our happy memories.” Jack told her. “I don't want to lose them as well.”

“I was hoping you'd say that” Rhiannon replied. “Now, how about a cup of tea?”

“I'd love one.” Jack replied, following her into the kitchen, head full of thoughts of both Ianto and Charlie, still as confused as he was the day he came home from Washington DC.

TBC


	20. Chapter 20

Jack moved slowly across the living room, one hand supporting his lower back, the other his bump and slumped down somewhat ungainly onto the sofa with a soft thud wondering how he was going to get through the next ten weeks without going mad.

Over the last few weeks his bump had blossomed from what looked like a bit of a beer belly, okay, a generous beer belly to looking like he was going to give birth any minute but according to Martha's last scan his pregnancy was still progressing normally and he was thirty one weeks pregnant.

Shifting his position on the sofa Jack reached the short distance to the coffee table next to him and opened his laptop, a sad smile crossing his face as the background picture of him and Ianto at their wedding came into focus.

“Good morning gorgeous.” Jack said softly, ghosting his fingertips down the image on the screen. “I love you.”

Opening the picture file that contained all the photo's from the wedding Jack set it to show them as a slide show, laying on his side on the sofa as he watched the pictures chance every few seconds on the screen until it reached the one someone had taken catching them off guard kissing as they danced at their reception and pressed pause.

Jack stared at the image for a while before closing his eyes, the moment still fresh in his mind as if it had been only yesterday, it had felt like there was no one else in the room at that time but the two of them, a small smile crossing his face as he remembered their whispered conversation.

“This as been the best day of my life.” Ianto told him, a huge grin on his face. “Nothing will ever beat it.”

“Nothing?” Jack replied.

“Well, maybe one thing, the day you tell me you're having my baby.” Ianto told him, brushing his lips against Jack's briefly.

“You really want kids don't you?” Jack asked.

“Only with you, I never even thought about it with ... but somehow I just know we're meant to be parents.” Ianto replied.

“Then one day your wish will come true.” Jack smiled. “We will have a beautiful baby.”

Ianto then kissed Jack fiercely in the middle of the dance floor, effectively bringing their slow dance to a complete standstill as he showed Jack just how much he loved him.

They had snuck away soon after, outside into the gardens and hiding among the trees and bushes as they kissed languorously, passionately, desperately and finally tenderly before heading back inside with bruised lips and a blush to even Jack face, obvious to everyone what they had been partaking in.

The reception had begun to wind down soon after, the guest knowing that the newly weds would never say they wanted them to go but knowing they wanted to be left alone to enjoy their wedding night. As soon as the last guest was out the door Jack grabbed Ianto's hand and dragged him to their room, both of them stripping off their clothes in a frenzy to be together skin to skin.

Jack reached over again and pressed play again as tears began to fall down his face, he knew he couldn't just blame the extra hormones flowing through his body for them, he still missed Ianto more than he was admitting to himself let alone his in-laws and Charlie.

As Jack set the photo slide show to run again he knew he was only putting off what he had actually opened the laptop to do, he knew there would be an email from Charlie waiting for him and the more they swapped emails the more Jack knew he wasn't anywhere near being ready for a new relationship.

But Charlie seemed to be seeing their correspondence as a slow build up to something more and Jack couldn't bring himself to tell him that for now he could only offer him friendship, scared that by doing so he would lose that as well.

Jack pressed the little 'x' at the top right of the screen and closed the slide show before clicking on the icon that opened his email, wiping away the tears on his face as he clicked on the anticipated email from Charlie and began to read.

Good morning Jack!

Well, I'm guessing it's morning as you open this as I wrote it late in the evening here. Spring is on the way, the trees are beginning to blossom as the first few flowers are poking their heads through the soil showing that new life is appearing once more and it makes me think of you and the baby.

I hope you are both doing well and she's not kicking you too black and blue on the inside? I can't wait to see her when she's born ... I was thinking, you can say no if you don't want me to, but I wondered if you'd like a visitor when you're due, just to help out a little?

By visitor I mean me of course, I haven't mentioned it before because I wasn't sure how you'd react but the time is getting close now, seemingly fast and if I don't ask now it could be too late by the time you reply.

Please don't feel obliged to say yes, I know you're still grieving for Ianto but it would just be as one friend helping out another in a time of need. Well, anyway, there's no harm in asking is there?

All is going good here with Torchwood Five, the rift still isn't very active and we're able to cope with what does slip through. You made a good choice, as I've said before in making Dafydd the leader, it's like he was born to the role.

Anyway, I should get back to work, things to do, archives to keep in order and all that! I hope to hear from you soon.

I miss you.  
Charlie x x

Jack reread the email twice, he liked Charlie a lot, he did but if he came over it wouldn't help, it would just confuse him even more about his feelings where Charlie was concerned and he new he wouldn't be able to cope with that along with a new baby.

Deciding he needed to take a while to think about his response Jack closed the laptop again and heaved himself off the sofa, walking slowly to the kitchen he poured himself a large glass of water and downed it in one, almost instantly regretting it when the urge to pee hit him fast out of nowhere.

Jack made it up the stairs and into the bathroom just in time, stripping himself of his clothes as he ran a bath in the hope it would help his aching back. Adding lots of his sister in laws bubble bath knowing she wouldn't mind Jack slipped into the hot water, sinking beneath the bubbles as the heat set to work on his aching muscles.

By the time Jack got out again the water was almost cold and he felt much better than he had before he had got in but a little sleepy, drying himself quickly Jack dressed in fresh briefs and slid into the coolness of the linen on his bed.

Turning on his side Jack placed a pillow under his bump for support and closed his eyes, at first the realisation that he was needing more sleep was a little unsettling but now he found he was actually looking forward to his naps.

When he was asleep all his thoughts and problems vanished, sometimes he dreamed of Ianto and although he woke up sad he was happy in the knowledge that he wasn't forgetting him. His face, eyes, lips, mannerism ... everything that made him who he was was still there and for that he was grateful.

Jack woke a few hours later from a dreamless sleep feeling refreshed, hearing noises downstairs he dressed and went down, guessing it was Rhiannon home for lunch and found her in the kitchen making sandwiches.

“You're awake, how are you feeling?” Rhiannon asked him as she buttered the bread.

“A little more human than I did when I got up this morning, boy does this little one take it out of me.” Jack replied.

“You just wait till she's born, you won't know what's hit you.” Rhiannon chuckled.

“I'm trying hard not to think about the birth, let alone what's to follow!” Jack groaned. “Although I know it will all be worth it.”

“Just like anyone else who's pregnant I would imagine.” Rhiannon grinned. “Like me!”

It took a few moments for her words to sink in, Jack's eyes widening in excitement as the penny finally dropped.

“You're pregnant?” Jack asked.

“I found out this morning, Johnny knows and you're the only other person I've told so far.” She told him grinning like a Cheshire cat.

“How far gone?” Jack asked.

“Only about six weeks I think, I can't believe it.” Rhiannon squealed.

“My daughter will have a playmate.” Jack replied. “What could be more perfect?”

“Nothing I can think of.” Rhiannon agreed.

“And now I have to go pee, again!” Jack sighed.

“At least I know what I have to look forward to.” Rhiannon chuckled as Jack headed upstairs.

Rhiannon placed two mugs of decaffeinated coffee next to the plates of sandwiches she had finished as he heard Jack yell out followed by the unmistakable sound of something or someone falling down the stairs.

Running into the hall she rushed over to Jack's crumpled body lying at the foot of them, a gash on his head from where he must have hit it on the way down.

“Jack, Jack, talk to me, oh for gods sake talk to me.” Rhiannon said to his still, unconscious form. “Jack please, wake up and tell me you're okay.”

Rhiannon watched as the small gash healed before her eyes but Jack still didn't move, checking his pulse and respiration she knew he was still alive and breathing but didn't have a clue what to do next, she could hardly call an ambulance to come to the aid of a pregnant man.

“Jack, please wake up, I need you to wake up.”

TBC


	21. Chapter 21

Jack knew something was different, wrong before he even opened his eyes. The last thing he remembered was his foot slipping on the carpet at the top of the stairs and being unable to stop himself as he tumbled head first down them.

And yelling, he remembered yelling out loud as if Rhiannon would be able to help in some way even though he knew it was too late. His senses were telling him his environment had changed but he was too scared to open his eyes and confront it, even the bed beneath him felt wrong but strangely familiar.

Eyes still closed Jack moved his hand slowly across the smooth cotton sheet below it, hesitating and taking a deep breath before lifting it to rest on his belly only to confirm what he was thinking when it can in contact with nothing but his flat stomach.

Emotions flooded Jack's brain, horror, shock and complete devastation as he allowed himself to understand what had happened. He had lost the baby, his own carelessness had robbed him of Ianto's daughter, the one thing he had left of the man he loved.

Rolling onto his side in the foetal position Jack hugged his arms around his legs as his loud sobs shuddered through his body, in all the years of his long life he had only ever felt so alone once before, when he'd lost Ianto and now he had lost the second most precious thing to him and he had no one to blame but himself.

Buried under the duvet sobbing Jack never heard the pounding of footsteps as someone ran up the stairs, the door being pushed open and nor did he register the weight of someone sitting on the bed next to him, just a vague feeling of a hand on his arm through the duvet which he ignored.

“Jack, Jack, what is it, what's wrong?”

Jack's muffled sobs were the only answer, his only thought being about how could they possibly ask the one question they must already know the answer too and then the duvet was pulled from over his head, the bright light from the room flooding into his eyes even though his closed eyelids as someone pulled him into a tight hug.

“Shhh, it's okay, I'm here.” The voice soothed. “It's okay.”

Jack hiccuped through his sobs as a very distinct scent filled his nostrils, the sound of the voice in his ears causing Jack to lift his head and finally open his eyes to see where he was and who was with him and he gasped in shock and confusion.

“Ianto?”

“Jack, what is it, talk to me?” Ianto asked him.

“No, you're not here, this is just a dream, a nightmare.” Jack insisted.

“Of course I'm here, where else would I be?” Ianto asked softly, brushing tears from Jack's cheeks with his fingers.

“You're dead, you and Gwen are dead.” Jack replied, sobbing into the arms of the man of his imagination. “You're just my brain trying to take away the trauma of losing our baby.”

“Jack, I'm not dead, I'm really here.” Ianto replied, his voice hitching as the anguish Jack was so obviously feeling caused his own emotions to overflow. “I promise you, this is not a dream.”

“It has to be, I took that job in Washington DC because I lost you, it's been seven months since you died, I can't have dreamed months in a few hours.” Jack tried to rationalize.

“It's not just a few hours Jack, you've been asleep for almost two days, don't you remember what happened?” Ianto asked.

Jack shook his head against Ianto's chest.

“Okay, well the limited information we had in the data banks said the side effects could also cause temporary memory loss.” Ianto told him.

“Limited information on what?” Jack replied, lifting his head once more still sobbing if a little softer now.

“We were out on a mission, something came through the rift.” Ianto began. “It seemed harmless enough, blue and fluffy and the size of a melon but it suddenly turned on us, you as usual put yourself in the line of danger and before we could shoot it, it bit you.”

“Bit me?” Jack frowned.

“Yep, we managed to shoot it before it escaped, you collapsed to the ground in a dead faint.” Ianto replied. “Once we got you and it back to the hub we managed to find a limited account of the creature.”

“What was it?” Jack asked.

“Origin or species unknown but it's attacked before, it seems it secretes a very effective sleeping venom in it's bite.” Ianto told him. “According to the files the two or three humans it's attacked have been out of it for between ten and fourteen days, with your bodies healing abilities you managed to get it out of your system in just under forty eight hours.”

“But it was all so real.” Jack replied. “We were ambushed by aliens and they shot all three of us before we had time to react, I came back to find you and Gwen dead.”

“Very much alive here.” Ianto smiled, lifting Jack's hand and placing it over his heart. “Feel.”

“And Gwen?” Jack asked, feeling the comforting beat of Ianto's heart beneath his hand.

“Gwen too, now what was it you were saying about a baby?” Ianto asked.

“In the dream, I was pregnant with your child, I had no idea how after dying but it seemed like some kinda miracle, some part of you was still in me and it made me so happy.” Jack said, giving Ianto a small smile as his tears began to dry up. “At the end of my dream I fell down a flight of stairs and when I woke and the baby wasn't there anymore I thought I'd killed our baby.”

“No wonder you were in such a state, oh Jack, I'm so sorry.” Ianto said, bending down and brushing his lips over Jack's.

“I liked it, I liked being pregnant with your baby.” Jack admitted.

“You know how much I want just that too.” Ianto replied. “Jack, I think there's something I should tell you.”

“Ianto ...” Jack began but he didn't get any further, his wrist strap that was currently on the bedside table beside him letting them know that something was coming through the rift and judging by the noise it was making there was more than one of whatever it was.

“Stay there Jack, Gwen and I can handle this.” Ianto told him.

“I'm fine Ianto.” Jack insisted, climbing out the bed and rummaging around for underwear in a drawer. “Call Gwen and get her to meet us at the hub.”

When there was no answer from Ianto Jack looked up to find him watching him intently with an odd look on his face.

“What is it, what's wrong?” Jack asked.

Ianto closed the distance between them in a few strides, pulling Jack into his arms and kissing him desperately as if he had been asleep for two years rather than two days. Jack melted into the kiss, for him it still felt like he hadn't seen Ianto for seven months, letting him take control until they parted breathlessly.

“We need to talk about something later, just remember I love you before you get mad at me, promise?” Ianto asked.

“I promise.” Jack replied, sure that he knew exactly what Ianto was going to confess. “Now call Gwen.”

“Yes sir!” Ianto chuckled, leaving Jack to dress.

Fifteen minutes later they were all at the hub, Gwen wasn't sure what she had done to be on the receiving end of the tight hug Jack had given her but she wasn't going to question it. One look into Jack's red rimmed eyes had told her he had be upset about something, she would ask Ianto later she decided.

From what they could tell at least half a dozen life forms had come through the rift near an abandoned warehouse on the other side of Cardiff, not far from Splott. Checking their weapons Jack couldn't help having a feeling of deja vu, something was niggling at the back of his mind and he couldn't remember what it was.

“Damn it!” Jack exclaimed as he tried to force the memory to the front of his mind.

“What?” Gwen asked, noting the frustration in his voice.

“There's something about this that seems so familiar but it won't come to me, like I've lived through this every day before.” Jack replied.

“Deja vu.” Ianto stated.

“Oh I get that all the the time.” Gwen replied. “Only the other day ...”

“I don't have the time for one of your stories now.” Jack snapped, annoyed with himself. “Sorry Gwen.”

“It's okay?” Gwen replied, but looking at Ianto questionably.

“Later.” Ianto mouthed silently to her before turning his attention back to Jack. “Do you want to take extra precautions just in case?”

“Yeah, I guess, but I don't know in what way.” Jack frowned.

“Right, I suggest extra round for our usual weapons plus something a little more heavy duty just in case they're required.” Ianto replied. “I'll be back.”

As Ianto headed for the armoury Gwen watched Jack, he looked deep in thought as he racked his brains trying to force the memory forth. She wondered if the bite Jack had received had had more side effects that they had anticipated, he looked like he wasn't quite with them.

She was just about to ask him when Ianto reappeared toting three machine guns, all loaded with rounds of enough ammunition to kill a heard of stampeding elephants.

“That should just about stop anything.” Gwen chuckled, taking the one offered to her and testing it's weight.

“I get the feeling we're going to need them.” Jack replied. “Okay, lets go.”

Pulling up outside the abandoned warehouse a short time later the feeling Jack had been having grew stronger but the details still remained just outside his grasp as they ran towards the door of the building, machine guns in hands.

Pushing open the door a crack Jack peered into the gloom, all he could see from his angle was a few piles of what looked like packing crates, he guessed they were empty but couldn't see any signs of life, alien or other wise.

“Looks clear but we should check it out.” Jack told the other two, preparing to enter the building. “I wish I could remember ...”

Jack pushed the door open wider and began to advance into the large storage space, he had barely moved a few feet when the beginning of his dream came flooding back to him.

“No wait.” Jack hissed to Gwen and Ianto as they almost walked into him as Jack stopped abruptly. “It's a trap.”

“How can you know that?” Gwen asked.

“The dream.” Jack replied, making no sense at all to her. “If we go in there we're going to be ambushed and we'll all get shot, we'll all die.”

“Dream, what dream?” Gwen pushed impatiently.

“I'll explain later, we need to find a way to get the advantage.” Jack replied, backing out the door along with them and closing it again. “They must know we're here by now.”

“Lure them out here somehow?” Ianto suggested.

“Yeah, but how, all the time they're in there they know they have one over on us.” Jack replied.

“Secret weapon.” Ianto grinned, pulling something from his pocket.

“Tear gas!” Gwen exclaimed. “Bloody brilliant.”

“I know.” Ianto grinned, cocking an eyebrow at her.

“Do it.” Jack told him.

Ianto moved to the door, pulled the pin and pushed the door open just enough to get his arm through and tossed the canister into the building and closed it again. The three of them moved out of sight, Jack and Gwen around the corner of the building and Ianto behind the SUV as they heard the screams of the aliens inside.

Within a minute of the gas entering the building the aliens exited through the door, their own machine guns hanging uselessly in their human like hands as they stumbled out in pain. Ianto raised his own gun and took aim.

“Wait.” Jack ordered, even though he now remembered how dangerous they were he wouldn't kill in cold blood.

One of the aliens stopped dead at the sound of Jack's voice, lifting his head, trying to focus through blurred vision he raised his weapon closely followed by the rest of the gang and a rain of shots rang out.

“Shit!” Ianto shouted, returning fire and hitting the exposed aliens as Jack and Gwen opened fire too.

All six aliens fell to the ground, dead. Jack, Ianto and Gwen advanced on them slowly, checking the bodies before allowing themselves to relax.

“Fuck that was close.” Gwen exclaimed.

“Closer than you'll ever know.” Jack replied, pulling them both into his arms and holding them tightly.

Sometime later, the aliens bodies dealt with Jack and Ianto headed back to their flat. Jack could now remember everything from when the alien bit him and the whole of his dream, feeling a little guilty about Charlie, the man with whom nothing had actually happened.

“Have you got a cousin called Dafydd?” Jack asked Ianto as he made them coffee.

“Yep, I haven't heard from him in years, he moved to the USA with his parents when he was a kid.” Ianto replied. “Why?”

“He was in my dream, strange as I've never even met him.” Jack told him.

“Jack.” Ianto said, taking a deep breath. “There's something I've been meaning to tell you.”

“I know, and I'm not mad, I promise, like I said earlier.” Jack smiled.

“How can you not be mad when you don't even know what it is?” Ianto asked confused.

Jack took Ianto's hand in his own and placed it on his belly, knowing what the very slight swell of his belly was, wondering how he had missed it earlier but positive it was because he was expecting to find a huge baby bump.

“There's something else that bit did to me other than put me to sleep, it seems it gave me precognition.” Jack replied. “I saw what would happen at the warehouse if we had gone in with just out usual weaponry, that you would be taken from me.”

“But ...” Ianto began.

“Let me finish.” Jack told him. “I know everything Ianto, about what you convinced the Doctor to give you, that you were giving it to me without telling me.”

“You read my diary, in your dreams?” Ianto asked, flabbergasted.

“Yeah and if everything in the dream was true, which I believe even more so now, I think I'm having a baby, your baby.” Jack smiled.

“You're really not angry with me?” Ianto asked. “I should never have done it, I ...”

Jack silenced him with a kiss.

“In the dream when I found out what you did I was so upset with you, but I came to realise it was the one thing in the world I wanted more than anything and when I woke and it, the baby was gone I felt like I wanted the world to end.” Jack replied. “So no, you shouldn't have gone about it the way you did, but I'm too happy and excited to care.”

“We should go back to the hub, do a scan.” Ianto replied excitedly.

“Later, first we need to celebrate.” Jack grinned, taking Ianto's hand and dragging him the short distance to the bedroom and tumbling onto the the bed with him in a tangle of limbs. “It still seems like months to me, and boy did I miss you.”

“Forty eight hours was too long.” Ianto replied, letting Jack plunder his mouth in a desperate kiss.

“Oh and your sister might have some news of her own in a few months.” Jack said, pulling back.

“Really? She's going to get pregnant?” Ianto asked.

“Yeah.” Jack chuckled.

“Can I tell her?” Ianto asked.

“Another of your secrets I now know, that she knows all about me.” Jack tried to frown but found he couldn't as Ianto looked guilty. “It's okay, but don't tell her, let it be a surprise.”

“Agreed.” Ianto said as they let the words give way to their actions and expressed their love for each other in the way they did best.

TBC


	22. Chapter 22

Approximately five months later.

“So, the queen has finally agreed for the trainees for Torchwood Five to be done here in Cardiff then?” Gwen asked, flicking through the details in the folders Jack had passed to her and Ianto.

“Yeah, it's taken long enough but I think she's realised it doesn't matter how often she asks me to go there to set it up I'm not going.” Jack replied, hand resting on his very extended belly. “Of course, she has no idea what the real reason is.”

“Miss Angela Stanley, Mr Christopher King, Mr Charles Smith and Dafydd Jones.” Gwen read out. “Dafydd Jones, is he Welsh?”

“He is, he's actually my cousin.” Ianto told her. “I haven't seen him since he emigrated when he was a kid.”

“And they're all ex FBI?” Gwen asked, reading through the details for Angela. “I thought there was only going to be three of them, how did Charles end up with a job too?”

“Some of their very best.” Jack told her. “All of them interested in what Torchwood does. Charlie was my own recommendation, he'll make a good archivist. ”

Jack had insisted, even though Charlie had declined at first but he knew it was the least he could do for him, if things had turned out differently, like the dream there could have been something between them eventually and he needed to give him a job he'd love.

“You talk like you know them already?” Gwen replied.

“I do, sort of.” Jack grinned.

“The dream!” Gwen exclaimed. “They're the people from your dream! Oh my god, they're real!”

“I told you, everything and everyone in the dream was real, if I hadn't had it I would have lost everything.” Jack replied. “That furry little alien did us all a huge favour when it bit me.”

“So, when do they arrive?” Gwen asked.

“In three days, Ianto has rented a three bedroom flat for them and after giving them a day or so to settle in and recover from the jet lag they'll be training with us full time.” Jack told her.

“Aren't you worried about them seeing you pregnant?” Gwen replied, eyeing Jack's huge belly.

“No, they'll all accept it.” Jack replied. “If they're going to work for Torchwood they need to be prepared for anything.”

“Throw them in at the deep end.” Ianto chuckled. “You do know that means you'll have to explain about how you can get pregnant?”

“They'll be fine with it all, I promise.” Jack grinned, then frowned, then groaned as his hand pressed at his belly.

“Jack, what's wrong?” Ianto asked, rushing to his side.

“Just a pain, it was nothing, just one of those braxton hicks again.” Jack replied.

“Sit down, I'll get you a drink of water.” Ianto told him.

“No, you stay with Jack, I'll get it.” Gwen said, standing and leaving the conference room.

“Thanks.” Ianto said as she walked out through the door. “Jack, do you want me to call Martha?”

“No, I'm sure I'll be fine.” Jack replied, grimacing as another pain shot through his body.

“You're not fine, I'm calling Martha.” Ianto told him, pulling out his mobile and locating her number. “She said she can commandeer a helicopter to get here quickly if she needs to.”

Jack nodded as another pain went through him. “It's not that painful yet, but, yes I think I am in labour.”

Gwen re-entered the room, handing the glass of water to Jack she sat close and watched him as he drank it down in a few gulps.

“Can I get you anything else?” Gwen asked, concerned for her boss, her friend.

“Not unless you can have this baby for me.” Jack told her with a wry grin.

“Is Ianto calling Martha?” Gwen asked, taking Jack's hand in hers as he grimaced again in pain.

“Yeah, I hope she can get her fast like she promised, I don't really want to retcon half the local hospital.” Jack chuckled softly, trying to cover his worries.

Ianto snapped his phone shut and turned to Jack.

“She'll be here as soon as possible.” Ianto told him. “She said that as there's no birth canal for the baby to travel down the usual method of walking around to speed up the labour is a no no.”

“So, what do I do?” Jack asked.

“She suggests lying down and being as still as possible.” Ianto told him.

“But there's still so much to do, before the trainees come over in three days.” Jack complained. “I haven't got time to sit around doing nothing.”

“You will do as you're told.” Gwen told him. “We are perfectly capable of doing anything that needs to be done and it's mainly paperwork, isn't it?”

“Yeah.” Jack replied a little sheepishly, knowing she meant that Ianto would be the one doing it anyway.

“Right, then go and lie down on the sofa and stay there.” Gwen commanded as Ianto tried not to laugh out loud.

“I do like a bossy woman.” Jack winked at her.

“Your husband in in the room and your in labour Jack, is there nothing that'll stop you flirting?” Gwen sighed, rolling her eyes.

“I doubt it.” Jack admitted, grinning as he headed down to the main hub and the sofa and laid down with a cushion under his head and closed his eyes.

“Where's Martha going to land the helicopter, at the airport?” Gwen ask Ianto as they watched Jack, his hand resting on top of his bump.

“No, one of the nearby buildings has a helipad, she'll land there.” Ianto told her, watching as Jack clutched the sofa as another contraction went through him, this time letting out a groan of discomfort. “I hope she gets here soon.”

“He's going to be okay.” Gwen reassured Ianto. “Hundreds of women give birth via C section every day.”

“I know, it's just ...” Ianto trailed off, his eyes fixed on Jack. “I need to be down there with him.”

“Then go, I'll man the phones and let you know when she's landed.” Gwen replied, practically pushing Ianto towards the conference room door.

Ianto bounded down the stairs and ran over to Jack, kneeling down beside him he kissed him softly on the lips making Jack's eyes spring open as he gave him a weak smile.

“Have you got the stopwatch?” Jack asked.

“As always.” Ianto said as he pulled it from the pocket of his waistcoat.

“Can you time the contractions, they're getting more painful and frequent.” Jack explained, beads of sweat forming on his brow as a particularly painful one shot through his belly.

“Tell me when the next one is building.” Ianto said, taking Jack's hand in his own.

“Where's Martha, I need Martha.” Jack pouted.

“She'll be here soon.” Ianto replied as he kissed him again softly.

“Now now!” Jack shouted as he felt the contraction building in his body and Ianto pressed the button on the top of the stopwatch.

Ianto gritted his teeth in an effort to not yell out as Jack squeezed his hand hard, Jack now yelling out his pain vocally in a loud growl.

“Gwen, any news from Martha?” Ianto called out as Jack loosened his grip.

“She's maybe about ten minutes away.” Gwen called back.

“Not long now Jack, do you want to move to the medical bay while you're in between contractions?” Ianto asked him, knowing moving would be better sooner than later.

“Okay.” Jack agreed. “Shit!”

Ianto looked at the stopwatch as Jack clutched his hand tightly again.

“Less than two minutes since the last one.” Ianto frowned. “I bet my sister hopes her labour is as fast.”

“Right now I wish I wasn't in labour at all.” Jack moaned.

“Gwen!” Ianto yelled.

“Just landing, I'll go and meet her on the Plass.” Gwen called back as she descended down the stairs.

“Tell her to get a wriggle on.” Jack hissed through a contraction.

“We'll be as fast as we can, get him to the medical bay and ready.” Gwen told Ianto, running out through the cog door.

Ianto helped Jack off the sofa and supported him as they made their way slowly across the hub, stopping twice as the pain shot through Jack's body. Once they were there Ianto helped Jack strip off his clothes and put on a simple gown that opened at the side so that Martha would be able to push it aside to do the operation and then helped him onto the examination table.

“Are you okay?” Ianto asked Jack as he closed his eyes and clutched the sides of the table.

“No, I'm in fucking agony.” Jack spat.

“Let me give you something, some pethidine?” Ianto asked.

“Nothing till Martha gets here, then I want every bloody thing going.” Jack growled.

“It'll be all over soon.” Ianto promised, brushing Jack's sweat damp fringe aside.

“Never again, never!” Jack screamed through his pain. “This is all your fault!”

“I know, I'm sorry.” Ianto replied quietly, feeling guilty and not for the first about his deception that caused Jack's pregnancy. “I shouldn't have given you those pills without you knowing.”

“No, you shouldn't!” Jack snarled as the cog door rolled open and Martha and Gwen ran in.

“Hey you two, no fighting.” Gwen admonished them.

“This is all his bloody fault.” Jack whined at her.

“Maybe, but you wanted the baby too so shut your complaining.” Gwen replied.

Jack went silent knowing she was right and then burst out crying.

“Martha please, it hurts so much, stop the pain.” Jack begged.

“I will I promise.” Martha replied, showing him the huge syringe she had in her hand.

“Bloody hell!” Ianto exclaimed as Jack fainted from a combination of pain and shock at seeing the size of the needle.

“He never did do needles well.” Ianto couldn't help but grin.

“What is it?” Gwen asked.

“A kind of epidural type drug but it'll work faster.” Martha replied. “Help me roll Jack onto his side please.”

Gwen and Martha carefully rolled Jack sidewards, holding him still while she injected the fluid in the syringe into Jack's spine between the vertebra.

“Thanks.” Martha told them, letting them roll him back on to his back.

Jack's eyes fluttered open. “I fainted didn't I? Hey, where's the pain gone?”

“No need to worry about that, now, lets get this baby out.” Martha replied, preparing herself and the equipment she needed for the birth. “Do you have anything to wrap the baby in?”

Ianto beamed as he pulled the baby pink blanket out of one of the cupboards and took the cellophane cover off of it.

“All prepared.” Ianto told her.

“Right, lets do this.” Martha said, making her first incision.

“I think I'll stand up that end.” Gwen said, moving to stand by Jack's head so she couldn't see what Martha was doing, Ianto however was transfixed as he watched he perform the operation.

“Here she come.” Martha said excitedly as she pulled the baby from Jack with a squelching sound and lay her in Ianto's arms as he held out the blanket.

The baby let out a piercing cry, letting the world know she had arrived as Martha clamped the umbilical cord.

“Do you want to cut it?” Martha asked Ianto.

Holding his daughter carefully in one arm Ianto took the medical scissors she offered him and cut in between the clamps with a huge grin on his face. 

“Now I just need to deliver the placenta and stitch Jack up a little so he can heal properly.” Martha said.

“Let me see her, let me see my daughter.” Jack said, raising his upper body on his elbows.

“Lets go and meet daddy.” Ianto whispered to the baby as she whimpered quietly.

Jack lay back as Ianto carefully put the baby on his chest, lifting his arms to hold her in place as he gazed at her face.

“She's beautiful.” Jack exclaimed. “Gwen, come and meet Saffir.”

Gwen didn't need telling twice, anything to take her mind of what Martha was doing to Jack at the other end of the table.

“She has Ianto's nose.” Gwen grinned.

“She's going to be gorgeous, just like her taddy.” Jack replied.

“Or her daddy.” Ianto grinned.

“Right Jack, your body is already healing itself by the looks of it, the injection I gave you should last a couple if hours and long enough to fend off most of the pain.” Martha told him. “I need to check the baby over now.”

“She fine.” Jack told her, not wanting to let her go.

“Jack, I just need to weight and measure her, check her heartbeat and then you can have her back.” Martha said, lifting her off her daddy's chest.

“I need to call Rhys.” Gwen said, pulling out her mobile. “Tell him the good news.”

With in a few minutes Martha handed Saffir back to her daddies.

“She weighs seven pounds and twelve ounces, is nineteen inches long and is completely healthy.” Martha told them. “You need to rest, but if the pain is tolerable when the injection wears off you can move and I suggest you go home.”

“We will.” Ianto told her. “Thank you so much for this.”

“I wouldn't have missed it for the world.” Martha grinned. “Now I have to get back, they don't even know where I went!”

“Thank you Martha.” Jack said, a tear of happiness sliding down his face as he watched his daughters eyes flutter closed in his arms.

“You just take good care of that little girl.” Martha said, kissing both Jack and Ianto on the cheek before grabbing her belongings and with a promise of visiting again properly soon she ran through the hub and vanished through the hub door.

“I'll leave you boys to it then.” Gwen smiled as she watched Ianto lean down and kiss his husband tenderly. “You know where to find me if you need me.”

“Okay.” Ianto replied distractedly as he kissed Jack again. “I love you.” He whispered to Jack.

“I love you too.” Jack replied. “I didn't mean what I said earlier, I was in pain and ...”

“Shhh, I know.” Ianto smiled. “It doesn't matter, nothing matters.”

“Kiss me again.” Jack asked softly.

Ianto complied without question.

The End.


End file.
